Just read Randy’s post about 2011 being a good year for him physically and family wise, although he did say he’s giving up on dating after a couple of going nowhere experiences. I’m confused. Both he and I question a deity and have no use for organized religion. I have had a lousy year … if there is a God and he is rewarding people for having faith, and punishing those who do not, then Randy also should have got a lousy year when God was handing those out.

All in all, then, so much for believing that a benign, mystical presence is ordering things, in which case what did the Haitians ever do to Him?

My year, as most of you know, went okay until the end of April when I got the breast cancer diagnosis. I was immediately taken off of hormone replacement therapy because many cancers are hormone dependent. I had a lumpectomy May 2, received a new radiation treatment, a one-time 90 minute focused dose in the surgical site that makes it unnecessary for me to have any more radiation, and Ed drove us home that same afternoon and I didn’t even take a nap.

I was a bit tired that week, then went back to my routine of walking, biking, stretching, and ballet jumps (I hold on these days). That was the honeymoon period. In September I had balance problems that wouldn’t go away, finally wound up getting a week’s worth of tests at the hospital, came home without a diagnosis (so much for modern medicine), continued with severe daily fatigue and had fevers every afternoon for the next two months. I attribute all this stuff to my body’s slowly building adverse reaction to finding itself without the hormones that were keeping me balanced. And I couldn’t find a substitute I could tolerate.

I wasn’t sleeping because of those hot flash things, my immune system was down and I was getting sick. Finally an allergist gave me nasal sprays to use to combat infections that don't show up in blood work and since then I am coming out of it though I am still not doing everything to the extent that I used to. I do think late April through December of constant physical malaise and disability qualifies as A LOUSY YEAR.

If you want to put a mystical twist on it, I think Randy is in league with the Devil.

Having said all that, I am really not in a bad mood, happy to still be here, optimistic about the future, and wish you all a great 2012.

xx, Teal