My neighbor, Tammy, died several days ago in Arizona, surrounded by her extended family, mother and sisters and children and grandchildren from an earlier marriage. I saw Gary on the seawall this morning and went out to talk with him. He said it had been Hell. I tried to stay away from remarks that would increase the pain. She had a rare form of cancer that invaded her entire body. She was barely past 50, a lovely tall blonde, who loved to have fun and drive her yellow convertible. There were times I thought she was shallow, but her grace and courage over the past four years of growing disability defies that description. Gary and Tammy had been together at least 15 years but married only last October. She was in such dire straits these past few months, emaciated, unable to eat, getting nutrition through an implanted port -- I can understand when she said recently, “I wish it was over.”

Ed noticed Gary working on his lawn and said he looked so sad. One’s mind jumps back to the beginning, the dream, the fun, the good things, and the years long companionship. It is yesterday, it is intense, and it seems you will never smile again.

xx, Teal