Great title for a post, huh?

At least you can't say I didn't warn you it would be a rant

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So ...Kevin came home with a frown, a story and another failing test (Math this time). He's falling behind at a rapid rate. I will hear on Monday if they've determined that he will need more special services than he's already getting (resource room for reading). I just have this bad feeling that they are going to say that I "just need to work with him more". This is basically what I've heard in the 4 years he's been in elementary school. He repeated K, went to summer school for 1st and now is struggling with 2nd. I've hired and made plans for him to start seeing a tutor once a week while sis is at dance and he's so upset with me. He doesn't want a tutor. He feels like he's being punished. I can't help but feel he's being punished too. Perhaps it's because I was never the type of student that had to try too hard to do well and his sister was always the same way. I really thought we were over the hurdle this year. We had conquered the "I hate school" crying and making himself sick part. But what's going to happen now when he's still failing even though he is doing his best and is going to school with a positive attitude? He's going to lose that happiness and positivity. Who wouldn't?? Tomorrow is the last day to qualify for the Principal's Challenge (quarterly). He already said he didn't want to go to school because he earned only 8 of the 10 quality points he needed to meet the challenge.

And on top of this, today their was a sub and she said some things to Kevin that are totally unacceptable. This is why he was frowning and sad when he came home. I know he's not perfect and that he can grate on one's nerves, but there is no excuse for anyone to talk to a 2nd grader this way. Kevin said he was giggling and she said "Shut your face." And then later in the day she said to him "Come sit next to me. This way I can bat you if you talk."

The kid is just being set up to hate school for the rest of his life. He's already the giant of his class. He's big for his real age, 8, but even bigger among his classmates that are all at least a year younger than him. Last week, Kev told me that his teacher had gotten him a bigger desk because he didn't fit in the ones the other 2nd graders are sitting in. I guess everybody chuckled (including Kevin) at how much bigger his is lined up next to the others. But as his mom, I don't think it's cute. I think teachers and adults at school see him as the big, uncooperative kid, not really good at school...not the type of kid that anyone's going to take that extra interest in.

I'm a teacher. I'm a mom. I see it happen. I can see how it happens. I just don't want it for my son.



And another thing...
Yesterday I didn't go to school because I had a migraine. I've been a mess for no one particular reason all week. I haven't been sleeping for longer than that. I guess things are just building up.

Well I come into the high school this afternoon and the first thing I hear from one of the other language teachers is "What happened to you yesterday?" And it wasn't at all in a concerned manner. I said (thinking it was none of her business) "I had a migraine..." She said "No, I mean I thought you were going to show a movie yesterday. It would have been a lot easier than doing that activity (I left a craft)" I asked (still thinking what the hell business is this of hers??) "Why, was there a problem? Did they leave a mess in your room?" Her answer stunned me more. No they hadn't made a mess... "It's just that I had to find the substitute scissors to use and glue...." I said "They were right on my desk with all of the other stuff she'd need." She didn't say too much at this point but then a student said "Mrs. W, where were you yesterday?" I said in a disgusted tone (which is exactly how I felt) "I had a migraine. I didn't realize that my absence would cause such problems for everyone."

Later another teacher mentioned the scissors and glue to me and I not only told her where they were- but also pointed them out on my desk. She said "Well sorry" I said back "You don't need to apologize. I just didn't realize that I did need to for being out and causing extra work for all of you." Believe it or not, I could go on about 2 more petty things from the day but I'm not going to. This is totally not the way my department usually acts. Usually they are very supportive and we're very close. I guess I should just let it go.

For the most part I have, but it's still there...poking at my heart. And I'm taking it personally, even though I tell myself it's unnecessary and counter productive. No good can come out of it.

Makes me wonder what's going to happen on Monday afternoon when I've taking a 1/2 personal day to meet with Kevin's teachers.


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And the icing on the cake? I just snapped at G because I was being over-protective of Kevin (when I know G really didn't mean anything by what he was saying). But unfortunately he's not having a good day either and he couldn't/ didn't/wouldn't just let it roll off his shoulder. Instead, he's mad at me...not talking to me...in the bedroom. He was going to play wii with his son but didn't because of our spat. So now I'm "responsible" for ruining the quality time he was going to have with his son.

Neither of my kids will be trick or treating with us this year. RIss is going with friends and sleeping over to a friend's house and Kev wants his dad to take him. I'm okay with it I think...

We'll see tomorrow...