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The meeting went well with the counselor. I told her about the bipolar. She said that she doesn't like to jump to something like that and she has only met with Kota one time. She did say he is very charming, intelligent and has a great imagination. I described to her one of his meltdowns. And I told her I have tried everything, talking calmly to him, sending him to his room. But nothing works. She did give me some ideas. She said the problem is that up to now I have fixed all the problems for kota. So when he is around other people, teachers they don't know kota as well as me so they can't fix it. What we need to do is help kota to deal with different situations and not to have a meltdown. She says what she sees is that he is not good in social situations, as in with other kids his age. So we are both going to work on helping him with that. She did say that after he has a meltdown, let him calm all the way down. Then talk to him about it by asking him questions. She did say that I should not let this situation make me feel as though I am a bad parent. She explained it this way. All kids develop at different rates. Like when he first laughed, when he took his first step, when he said his first word. In all of those areas kota was ahead of the game. He is doing very well academically. It is just his development has not progressed as fast in the social area. Once she said that I let out a big sigh. It just really clicked with me. I have been feeling that it was my fault, that I have done something wrong to cause all of this. Ok, yes I do too much for kota and the counselor lectured me about that. lol I am a control freak. So I also have to retrain myself. Small steps is the way to go.
I do feel better but it was just emotionally draining. Talking about all the bad things and also admitting to her the things I know I am doing wrong. She is a great counselor and she never makes me feel bad about myself or my parenting skills. Some of her other suggestions were play dates with kids kota's age. Summer camp, not the kind where he is gone for a couple weeks, but day camps. I would love to do that but I don't think we can afford it on top of the karate. She did say the karate would also be good for him.
So right now my thoughts are going a mile a minute in my head. Tomorrow I will sit down and write out a game plan. different activites that kota should do on his own. Like picking out his own clothes for school, picking up after himself more, etc. My nerves are a little shot, as kota was not cooperating with me this afternoon and it was almost me who had the meltdown.
Next week kota meets with the counselor again. My insurance will pay for 20 sessions so she is going to make sure we save some for the end of the summer to get him ready for the next school year.
Good luck with it..
