Annie

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Username:: anniel
Name:: Annie
Location:: Klamath Falls, OR
Birthday:: 03/08
Status:: Married

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Life & Events > Relationships > No Title for This Difficult Blog.

No Title for This Difficult Blog.

Okay... this is a blog that I have been mulling over in my brain for quite sometime. I'd like to just shove it aside and blog about fun everyday stuff, but in good conscience, I just can't do that.

First of all, I'll give you some background. Like many families, our family has a person who is gay. My dear dear nephew, Adam, is gay and has a partner whom he married. They are living in Florida and have a business there.

Sadly, Adam and I, who were once close, hardly speak to one another any more. I think it is mainly because I didn't invite his partner to JR and my wedding. The gay issue had nothing to do with not inviting Clark, but it was all the stories that Adam had told me about Clark's eradicate behavior and that he was quite violent. I guess, I was scared out of inviting him because of the stories Adam had shared with me. Although, I explained that to Adam, he still insisted I didn't invite Clark because he was gay.

Now... if Adam would think back, he would remember that I had his previous partner to my house for a family Thanksgiving and I also had played hostess to a friend of his who was very near death from Aids. I had cared for this man for a week at my house while he couldn't hardly get out of bed. Adam has Aids, too, and I've never turned him away from my house.

So that is the background. But here is the part that I am having a hard time blogging about. I love Adam very much and I feel very close to many of my gay friends here on MyBloggers. But, I don't agree with the life choices they have made. I think it goes against God's plan for what marriage should be and the whole Biblical teaching of procreation. I believe that God meant marriage to be between a man and a woman and that anything else is wrong.

Okay, I've said what I believe and I know I will probably loose some dear dear friends over what I believe. I just have been feeling that my silence on this matter was in a way... dishonesty.

Soooo... if you read my blog and decide you no longer want to be my friend because of how I believe, I will understand. At the same time, I will be very saddened by the loss of your friendship. I value each of you and I don't condemn you for your lifestyle. I just don't agree with your lifestyle and I pray for you.

I guess that is enough said. Now, I have the task of clicking the "post article" button. I want you to know, this is not an easy thing that I am doing. But, I feel that honesty is the best way to have a true friendship.

Sincerely and with much love - Annie :o)

posted on Nov 16, 2008 9:47 PM ()

Comments:

Annie...I feel our state of Oregon is just as blue as Cali yet our voters passed Prop 36 stating that marriage is between one man and one woman. Gays and Lesbians here do have the right to domestic partnership but that's not the same. I feel that those same people were the types that believed in segregation between blacks and whites in the 1950s. They wore the white hoods and burned crosses on lawns. I know you are a good person but, at the same time, have way conservative views. Studies show that homosexuality is not a choice and that they are born with those feelings. If there is love involved should it matter that it's between the same genders. People that feel that way may also feel that races shouldn't mix either. I don't mean to bag on this topic but I'm tired of this B.S. about denying rights to anyone. The constitution says that all men(meaning mankind)are created equal(with equal being the key word.) Our forefathers didn't want limits on equality. I'm talking as a heterosexual that doesn't care if gays get married as long as they do truly care for each other. There are heterosexuals out there that get married for the wrong reasons. Thank you for letting me sound off.

comment by draco on Nov 19, 2008 4:28 PM ()

Aloha Annie....LOL sorry to laugh but honestly I am not that shallow. I have many friends and family who disagree with my lifestyle but at the same time support and love me so I have no issue with you. I am sorry to hear about Adam and will pray for a good resolution to your issue. Having dissension in the family is so difficult and painful. My prayers & chants go out to you both. How is Adam doing with AIDS or is it HIV?? Hugs & love.

Dale

comment by panthurdreams on Nov 18, 2008 8:48 AM ()

Hi Annie! I like the way you worded your beliefs!..

I have a gay niece and I'm not sure if she should get married or not. I'm still confused on that..

comment by carrryon on Nov 18, 2008 2:15 AM ()

I'm wondering if I should bother...there are so many wonderful comments down here!

Jesus asked us all to love one another as He has loved us. As far as I can tell, that's what you're doing.

comment by janetk on Nov 17, 2008 4:41 PM ()

I think you did a good job expressing what you feel and believe, and did it in a manner so as not to be disrespectful or judgmental. I was raised to believe that homosexuality is a sin, and also that marriage is for one man and one woman. That is not to say that that is how I believe now. I understand that there are a lot of gay and lesbian people and although I may not "accept" it fully I do recognize it as a choice and respect that. I am still unsure about gay marriage. But I still treasure my gay friends, past and present, and respect them for following their hearts. I understand too what it is to lose a loved one to AIDS and to feel that loss even years later. You are doing as Jesus does, loving the "sinner" (all of us) and disapproving of the sin (which we all do). I wish there were more like you, Annie, that can distinguish between the two, sin and the sinner. No one needs to feel hated because of their sin, which unfortunately happens all too often.

comment by busymichmom on Nov 17, 2008 4:24 PM ()

Hey, at least you are honest.

comment by gtasahomo on Nov 17, 2008 12:42 PM ()

We vote for politicians, not laws. The laws are passed in Congress and Legislatures. Even CA Prop. 8 won't be law until the state legislature makes it official. When an initiative petition is on the ballot and it passes, most states still require the Legislature to pass the law into the books. We can vote up or down on taxes, too, but the governments involved, such as school districts and states must officially adopt the taxes before they are legal. Majority rule is not what it seems. If we had true majority rule we would have had slavery fifty years longer. Emancipation was made a Constitutional Amendment. Ask one of our judges about it (Steve.) We have checks and balances to keep the majority from injuring minorities. After all, we are all a minority of one.

I'm not arguing or disagreeing with your opinion, just stating the facts.

comment by jondude on Nov 17, 2008 10:13 AM ()

No comment here Annie.Not sure what to add to this.
What ever you think that is right,it is your choice.
There is a couple there I do not go along with.But then again their choice.

comment by fredo on Nov 17, 2008 9:36 AM ()

Annie: The laws of the country are written in the Constitution, not decided by voters. You got the part wrong about the majority ruling the minorities. That's why we have the protection of a Constitution, to deny the tyranny of the majority.

comment by jondude on Nov 17, 2008 9:10 AM ()

Annie, we all have our beliefs. I have never felt any disrespect or a forcing of your beliefs (on anything) on me (or anyone else for that matter).
You are such a valuable person that we should all cherish.
When it comes to Adam, I would say that it is easier for him to blame you and his perception of your actions rather than to take on the fact that he contributed to the decision by presenting a negative image of his hubby. I can understand why you made the choice that you did with your wedding. Actually, even if I didn't, a wedding day is meant for the bride and the groom. It is not up to us to say who they should and shouldn't celebrate that special day with.
Don't worry about my feelings. I still hold you as a cherished friend.
AJ

comment by lunarhunk on Nov 17, 2008 8:42 AM ()

Annie: I too had some friends in California who were gay. I have no opinion about the gay marriage issue because it doesn't affect me. My feelings are live and let live, and God has nothing to do with it. The rule I live by is this - The interaction between man (and woman) and God is a personal one, not a societal one. Everyone is entitled to their own opinion. When (and it eventually will happen) the US Supreme Court strikes down discriminatory laws like Prop. 8, it will be settled and people will be able to live and let live. Christianity has no right to impose its laws on all of society.

comment by jondude on Nov 17, 2008 2:41 AM ()

When all the fighting and name calling was happening on Blogster because of this gay issue, I tried to articulate then how I view this. Ekyprogressive (James) is a good friend of mine. As I told him, I don't understand homosexuality; but you probably don't understand heterosexuality. I said it then, and I will say it now. It is not for me to set myself up as judge of anyone. That is reserved for a much higher authority than I. I also have many gay friends here. Do I believe that gays should be allowed to marry? No, quite honestly, I do not. I too believe that marriage should be between a man and a woman. That's being honest, just as you were. That's my opinion; it is not a reflection or a condemnation on anyone else's opinion. I too had a gay relative--a cousin of my husband's and one of my former students. Sadly, he died of AIDS before the coming of today's drugs. He was smart, articulate, funny, and a delight. His death deprived the world of a young man who had a great deal to offer.

People like Fredo, Dale, Stephy, James, and many more are good friends, and I certainly don't want to lose their friendship; but I too feel honesty, when expressed without recrimination is the best policy. I do not wish to be hypocritical.

comment by redimpala on Nov 17, 2008 2:03 AM ()

Annie, I agree with Kelli...most of the gay citizens of MyBloggerstown are wonderful human beings and will continue to be your friends. You merely stated your feelings and beliefs and condemned no one. This is how mature, adult discussions of this topic should be conducted. Good post, my friend.

reguards
yer faithful pal
bugg

comment by honeybugg on Nov 17, 2008 1:22 AM ()

Annie, I will respond since I am a gay man. I have no problem with what you believe about marriage. My only argument is that you see it as a choice. I tried very hard not to be gay. I fought it. No one in there right mind would choose to be discriminated against and subject themselves to bashing, hating and assault that so many gay men and to a lesser extent women, are subject to.

I myself believe in God, consider myself a Christian, attended seminary and was at one time a preacher. I struggle because I have read the same text and passages you have. But I always go back to Matthew were Jesus says there is only one unforgivable sin, blasphemy against the Holy Spirit. Last time I checked, homosexuality is not blasphemy. In God's eyes, sin is sin, whether it is lying, stealing, coveting, lusting, pride, avarice, greed.

I am still your friend.

comment by thepirateinthecity on Nov 17, 2008 1:00 AM ()

Annie, I highly doubt that any of the gay/lesbian people on this site will turn away from your friendship. You know, there are many that agree with you and there are many that disagree with you. I don't think it is wrong for you to put your beliefs out there. There's nothing wrong with how you believe. It is your belief. I think the problem comes in when people begin to look down on them because of their lifestyle. Some people (yes, I have witnessed it here on MyBloggers) have actually gone way out of line when communicating with the gay/lesbians that we have on MyBloggers. It is not okay to condemn them and you have just stated that you do not condemn them or judge them. I have seen people condemn them and post things that hint at condemnation. Those are the people I have the biggest problem with. I may not agree with their lifestyle, as an individual. I may not want that lifestyle for myself. But, that does not make me their judge. I hope I'm making sense here, Annie.

comment by hopefields on Nov 16, 2008 10:47 PM ()

But, I don't agree with the life choices they have made. I think it goes against God's plan for what marriage should be and the whole Biblical teaching of procreation. I believe that God meant marriage to be between a man and a woman and that anything else is wrong.

I believe and feel the same way you do Annie.

comment by texastar on Nov 16, 2008 10:12 PM ()

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No Title for This Difficult Blog.