I am too pissy to write today. My words feel like sharp little darts so watch out! Damn it I hate to feel this way. I need to take a vow of silence to figure out a more constructive way to use my hormonal rage. Is it hormonal or is that what I am supposed to say just to devalue my own anger?

I just would like an "I am sorry?" Is that so much to ask for? Today it seems it is. Do you have any idea what usually happens? I usually let my frustrations get the better of me then I start going off like a missile headed straight for planet crazy. I end up looking like the mean one.

I am sure I may have mentioned once or twice that I do not care for the perpetual victim. The odd thing is that I create them and leave them crumpled and crying saying things like "I can't believe you said that?" Yes my mouth has really a life of its own at times.

If there were a burn contest I am sure I can leave the best in ashes. My friend once dated this guy who loved to hurt people verbally. He loved to attack weaker insecure individuals and their tears were his trophies. He tried his game with me and even stooped as low as bringing up my father who had passed away and then it was on.

My secret weapon is my ability to laugh as I cut into someone. I cut into him until he was less than half the man he walked in as. He all of a sudden turned into a little injured mouse scurrying for a whole to run into and cry. Oh I laughed and laughed as I brought up the dirtiest dirt I could think of.

On the flip side of my victory over this imbecile, he took my friend home and beat the hell out of her for everything that I said.

So you see I am in danger of letting my hurt carry me away and take out several along the way. I really don't want to be the one that has to deliver all of the "I am sorry" today. I would like to receive one without having to verbally castrate someone for it! I really just don't want to get my hands dirty. Anyone have some gloves I can borrow?