I don't usually like to share my bad news, but today I feel compelled. I openly shared my surprise pregnancy so I feel the need to tell you all we have taken a turn for the worse. Last night at work I began to cramp up. I went to the ER today, I thought that the cramping was not to big of a deal. I have been wanting to get an ultra sound just to know how many and to see the miracle of life me and the man created.

The doctor searched and searched and found an empty sac. No candy bars, no babies just a sac. No heart beat. No baby. I was sent home with the instructions of how to get threw a miscarriage. They said maybe the baby is stunted, only after I began to cry, maybe but how does an empty sac all of a sudden come to life? When I asked the Doctor this he had no answer.

I am confused. I feel sick. I feel heart broken. I just wanted to see the baby and now this. My mind is just rolling down the river of sadness. The kids are sad and the man is so sad.

I called into work. Every woman and their dog are pregnant at work. I could not face them today. I feel like a defect. I don't really know how to deal with this.

My biological clock is ticking in my ears today. It is ticking away as a sac lays lifeless in my extra large aging uterus.

Sorry for being Debbie downer, i am just very very sad.