If I am going somewhere in the car and when I get there I have to take off my shoes, then I don’t bother lacing them to start with (unless I am driving).

A while back I dug out an old pair of black sneakers and started wearing them but, while they had been languishing in the closet, the glue holding the soles together had dried out. So, in the market no less, both soles started flopping. It was like walking in clown shoes. I grabbed a couple of plastic bags, twisted them into a rope and tied them around the insteps. It was not a fashion statement but I was able to finish shopping.

Since I don’t like to sew, Ed feels violently betrayed when he asks me to sew a button on and I don’t get to it for a couple of years. Hey, I don’t do my stuff either. But it could be worse. I could just never cook. But he has so much stuff, that I just put the offending garment out of sight and he forgets about it. If he ever reads this, he will divorce me.

I needed lightweight casual pants so I went on line and bought hospital scrubs and only $20 a pair. Perfect. But they were too long. So I folded the legs to the right length and taped them down. Yes. I wore the blue ones till they needed a wash, so I pulled the tape off and threw them in the machine. Then I taped the legs on the white pair. When the blue came out of the wash, I spread them out flat, and measured them against the taped-up white pair. No difference. The blue pair had shrunk in the wash. No sewing and no taping either. I am truly blessed.

My friend, Sue, who I relied on for alterations, couldn’t make a go of her shop a couple of years ago. So she closed it up and moved back to Wisconsin where, apparently, there is no end of customers needing clothes fixed. Since she left I think twice before buying anything that needs really fine tuning. Most alteration shops are at least a half hour away by car. What a bore.

And once, at a party in New York, I confessed to another guest that the beads she was admiring were being held together with grocery ties. “You’re my kinda gal,” she said. And that's New York.

xx, Teal