I am feeling sad today. About several things but I dont' wish to talk about it now. I feel myself closing down to my friends. I am pretending I am fine, my world is great. And for the most part that is true. but there is this kernal inside of me, sadness. wondering, rethinking over and over and over. putting myself down, making myself feel worse about me. I know it isn't true but I can't stop those voices. I am tired, weary, exhausted. I need all of my energy to function. I am going to take a nap because my mind doesn't shut down even at night. And I really don't care what chores need to be done and hubby doesn't either. I want to hide from the world, forget about everything. I will lose myself in a book, its the only time I stop thinking, stop hearing the voices. their not real voices, its just my mind telling me different things about myself. I'll turn the phone off but keep the cordless next to me. I don't want to cry. I don't want to feel this way either. would it be better to not feel?