This post was originally going to be yet another update/excuse on why I am not posting here with any consistency right now. *working 2 jobs, school, motherhood* but then I realized that it wasn't because of lack of time, but rather lack of subject. I write mostly about my observations about everything from Karma to commercials so really you would think that nothing would ever really run out for me. I am not a political writer, but I will touch on what effects certain things have on my life.

Then it hit me. Right now I have a lack of wonder in my life. You can call it what you will, writer's block etc... but it really comes down to a simple lack of wonder. Truthfully I cannot say that I am surprised. I get up, go sit at a desk and analyze data about peoples habits, I leave from there and sell to people that have too much money to send on silly things, I go home and watch the same formulaic shows on TV if I don't have a good book to read. Really what do I have to wonder about.

I try to think about my son, he is a smart witty young man, but even then I fall flat. He is studying and achieving these great things and I feel proud, but wonderment. No. I am becoming relatively proficient at work, but that's only because my routine doesn't vary. What am I missing that I so rarely have a problem finding.

Maybe it's because the curiosity on who is going to become then next leader of your country is over. Or because I already have my Christmas shopping done so I don't need to strive for the perfect gift. Or because my landmark birthday was last year and this year was something I didn't even notice. Possibly because I am in a good enough spot that I am not stressing over bills and how to make one gallon of gas last 2 days.

So ok maybe I need to take back what I said. Here I am wondering about why I can find anything to wonder about. I feel like a dog chasing her tail, then being amazed that it hurts when I bite it. I'm not sure that this is progress, but it's something isn't it?