Bahiyyih

Profile

Username:
wickedwitchofthewest
Name:
Bahiyyih
Location:
Ellensburg, WA
Birthday:
07/30
Status:
Not Interested
Job / Career:
Entertainment

Stats

Post Reads:
23,994
Posts:
123
Last Online:
> 30 days ago
View All »

My Friends

3 hours ago
5 hours ago
22 hours ago
4 days ago
8 days ago
18 days ago
> 30 days ago
> 30 days ago

Subscribe

Wicked End Of The Stick

Entertainment > Humor > Cheat and Die.
 

Cheat and Die.

I worked this whole holiday week. We opened Christmas presents at 5:30 in the morning before I left for work. It was great, but after being at work for a few hours I felt bad and thought I should be with the family. In my despair I called the man to hear how much fun our sweet angels were having. As soon as he answered I could hear one screaming "THAT IS MINE!" and another "THIS IS BROKEN! IT IS BROKEN!!!" Then I heard his deep breath before he yelled out "THAT IS ENOUGH! I SAID THAT IS ENOUGH!!" I slowly and without remorse clicked the end button.

YIKES!

Candy for breakfast, no sleep and new things to battle over it nearly broke my heart having to not be there. I thought about calling back but got lost in the euphoric silence of work.

I am on a new diet... I started it a week before Christmas because yes I hate myself. I was doing to great until Christmas eve. Cookie trays started showing up at the door step. I had not had sugar for a week and felt it was only polite to at least have a sample or four.

After my mini binge me and the man headed out for last minute gifts. As soon as we left the driveway stomach started to cramp. I felt like I was going to vomit. I began to sweat like a dog and I was dizzy and all of a sudden I could not breath. All I could think was Oh great God gave me a chance to stick to my diet and I go and cheat now he is going to kill me.

I told the man I don't feel good over and over again. He asked me if I wanted him to take me back home. I screamed out NO! Take me to the hospital I am having a heat attack!

After about five minutes all of a sudden I felt fine.

I HAD A PANIC ATTACK BECAUSE I CHEATED ON MY DIET!

I gave away all the cookies... I never thought I would die by cookie I always pictured death by cake. Frostingand tears everywhere!



posted on Dec 27, 2012 8:38 PM ()

Comments:

God should give me a panic attack if I cheat on my diet ! You are
always so much fun to read.
comment by elderjane on Dec 31, 2012 7:40 AM ()
comment by kristilyn3 on Dec 29, 2012 7:47 AM ()
This is very funny! I think I'll shoot for death by bread pudding...
comment by steve on Dec 28, 2012 10:51 AM ()
The description of calling home got a laugh from me.
comment by troutbend on Dec 28, 2012 10:06 AM ()
panic attack bad medicine
comment by kevinshere on Dec 28, 2012 2:23 AM ()
You are so funny! Dieting at Christmas time is hard, but it sounds like you made it through.
comment by maggiemae on Dec 27, 2012 8:42 PM ()

Comment on this article   


123 articles found   [ Previous Article ]  [ Next Article ]  [ First ]  [ Last ]