An article in The Atlantic entitled "Why Women Still Can't Have It All" has been making the rounds via e-mail, social media, and word-of-mouth for the past few days.

Written by Princeton professor Anne-Marie Slaughter, it's generating serious buzz, attracting more readers in a 24-hour period on The Atlantic's website than any story in its history. And discussions about what it means for women and men to balance work and life have been sprouting up all over, from social media to NPR to the New York Times.
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I got the above in an E mail that also solicited my opinion on the article, if I chose to read it, and said they would share my thoughts with the author.

So I read the piece and gave them my thoughts. This woman is remarkable. Many women in the workplace at high levels are remarkable these days. Many of them have families too. Prof. Slaughter had to leave one high-level government job when she decided that her teen-age son really needed her to be on hand. Oh, the agony, oh, the choice.

I responded, of course. My experience was in the middle, not the rarefied atmosphere of these women. My successes were modest, but my income was far above anyone with my early background usually got, so I think I did okay. And, of course, I chose not to have children, not so much because of career pressure, but because I wanted time for myself to dance and to study piano.

So the bitch is “we can’t have it all”. First off, men have to make the same choices. How many stories do you hear from kids that say “Dad was never there for us – he was always on a business trip?” The sad truth is it was easier for Dad to make that choice because of his biology. Men are expected to do that, women are not. Women are free to make that choice too, but it plays havoc with their predisposition as nurturers.

In any case, Prof. Slaughter did have it all. What she didn’t have is peace of mind. So … who has piece of mind 24/7? Stop whining, was my advice.

xx, Teal