Teal

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Teal
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Teal's Modest Adventures

Jobs & Careers > Laughs from My File
 

Laughs from My File

In 1983 I was working as assistant to the President of the New York Times Syndication Sales Corp. He was a self-involved sort who often prioritized his personal wish list. He had signed up for an Information Industry Association conference and at the last minute, decided he didn’t want to go. He assigned me to write a letter excusing him and asking to be forgiven the entry fee for which he had been billed, even though the deadline for canceling was past. “You’ll think of something,” he said.

I wrote two letters – and put them both on his desk. Here is the one he did not send:

Gentlemen:

Please cancel the enclosed invoice addressed to K… H…… for his attendance at the 15th Annual Convention of the Information Industry Association. We realize notice of cancellation is past your deadline, but I feel sure you will wish to accommodate Mr. H when you learn of the unfortunate circumstances leading to his absence.

On the eve of the meeting, Mr. H discovered he has A.I.D.S. You can imagine the shock to his family, not to mention his system, or to the several normal people with whom he shares his favors (I doubt they’ll think of them as ‘favors’ any longer, if you know what I mean).

As for the transmitter, Mr. H has hardly had time to investigate and his task is the more difficult as those baths were shut down by the Health Department only two days before he learned of his condition. In any case, thoughts of revenge must be far from the man’s mind. No, he is far more concerned in getting his health attended to, and he must also make plans to provide for his illegitimate child, should the end be near, or should his income here be suddenly curtailed.

The Times is very generous to its employees-in-crisis, but even that august body has its criteria. It is true $420 would not go far, but the little beggar would be most grateful.

Thank you for consideration of this claim.

(Typed with a ten-foot pole.)

Respectfully,

HS

P.S. Please address your reply to my replacement.

xx, Teal

posted on Feb 18, 2015 12:02 PM ()

Comments:

I love your sense of humor!! That is priceless.
comment by gapeach on Feb 21, 2015 10:52 AM ()
hee hee....and its all accurate, right?

reguards
yer I had a supervisor like that once pal
bugg
comment by honeybugg on Feb 20, 2015 4:44 AM ()
When I met him he was on wife no. 3 who had left her husband and children to move to NY and be with him. Then they divorced because they were both users and in an arrangement where you have a user, then you have to have a "usee". Then he was put in charge of the Paris office and married a French Eurasian. I thought his being in Paris was a hoot because he was not good with languages.
reply by tealstar on Feb 20, 2015 4:43 PM ()
comment by jondude on Feb 19, 2015 10:34 AM ()
Too funny. Did he appreciate your humor? I know I did.
comment by boots586 on Feb 19, 2015 7:32 AM ()
So amusing!! Did he faint when he read it?
comment by elderjane on Feb 19, 2015 5:14 AM ()
He knew me well enough to roll his eyes. Also, once he was in a foul mood and I said, "You are good looking, married to the perfect new blonde trophy wife, have a top job for a top company, calling all the shots, WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM?" His mouth dropped open.
reply by tealstar on Feb 19, 2015 8:39 AM ()
That's just perfect. You must have a good laugh every time you come across it in your files.
comment by troutbend on Feb 18, 2015 12:55 PM ()

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