I came to know my pal who worked nearby at one of the jewelry/clothing boutiques a few months ago. We got along great. I invited her for lunch and a swim. We did that. Her hours at the shop were cut to Thurs/Fri/Sat., so that’when I’d go by.

She was seeing this fellow and we talked about him a lot. He was going through a divorce and she was worried that she was just a temporary convenience while he got emotionally organized. The divorce finally went through and they are still strongly together, and I am in her corner.

They came to my “you missed the boats” party. He plays and I let him have the piano. He seemed to have a great time.

She is always really happy to see me and has been generous with things that I might use that she doesn’t need, that fit me. She saved me a trip to the Bell Tower because she had the perfect strapless bra and I needed one. Believe me that’s a big deal because getting Ed to go into Fort Myers for underwear is a no-win.

A few weeks ago I stopped in to the shop and she was so excited. This was to be her last day and she and her boyfriend were going into business together, opening their own jewelry/clothing boutique in the heart of the Fort Myers business district. He is sponsoring her. Wow. Great. It’s good I came by, I said. “I would have called you,” she said. How can I decorate, she asked. I looked up her stated themes on line and sent her an E mail with suggestions. I did this right away.

No contact since then. And no contact from her anyway. We saw each other because I went by and because I invited her to things. I know she is busy now – a new business is very demanding. But what about before? A couple of lines in an E mail might indicate a continuing friendship.

I think I know what’s going on with her. She is about 15 emotionally and doesn’t have the ability to lead a rounded life without him being in the center of it. You know how best friends in high school break up when one of them gets a boyfriend?

So why not invite both Ed and I for dinner? Maybe the boyfriend is not that into us. I can deal with that. But what about her? She lives in a separate house but then, of course, she’d have to spend a night without him. Oh, choke, gasp. In any case, it’s a disappointment. And here’s a thing that happened a while back that does kind of bother me. Some foreigners, Germans, came into her shop early last summer. They got on famously. Where could they rent a boat. Hey, my boyfriend and I have a terrific boat, come on out with us. They spent a glorious day sailing with these foreign visitors. Now I ask you, if I had a boat, would I not invite friends? It never occurred to her that Ed and I might be viable invitees to a day on the water.

I have toyed with the idea of sending her an E mail to say I am disappointed that she is so poor at staying in touch and that we don’t meet if I am not making the effort. Is that a bad idea? Isn’t the advice always to be open and frank in order to maintain a good relationship or in the immortal words of Gold Meir, What am I, chopped liver?

xx, Teal