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Education > Parent Involvement > About Elizabeth Smart and Kids in General
 

About Elizabeth Smart and Kids in General


The recent trial of Elizabeth Smart’s abductors is in the news. To recap, in June 2002, 14-year-old Elizabeth Smart was kidnapped from her bedroom at knifepoint and held for 9 months by a religious nut who had her terrorized. I don’t know how long it takes for someone to overcome that kind of experience at such a young age.

Remembering myself at 14, I do know that no nut would have been capable of preventing me from escape, short of keeping me in irons in a fortress-like basement. The nut “married” her and raped her and told her she was his wife. He wanted her to keep a diary and because he was reading it, she pretended to like being where she was, but in French, wrote that she hated it and wanted to be back with her family.

It would seem that young Elizabeth didn’t have any of the emotional stamina that would have led to an inventive escape. And she had opportunities. They took her to restaurants and shopping. Once in a cafe, an alert detective questioned her and wanted to look under her veil but her “husband’s” other wife squeezed her leg and she kept mum. I would have been screaming. What kind of upbringing turns out such a wimp?

I believe that middle- and upper-class families cocoon their children who are then incapable of dealing with harsh realities should they be forced to. Oh, no question, my mother would have cocooned me if she could, but she worked and didn’t know how pervasive evil was in our neighborhood. A friend of the family molested me. I never told, but I stayed away from him. (He owes me his life – my dad and uncles would have killed him, no question. Greek justice.) Perverts would stalk me at the local theater, sitting next to me and I would get up and move. Piece of cake. You don’t have to explain yourself, just move. And you don’t have to have nightmares about it either, just move.

Yet parents get upset if schools warn against danger, wanting to protect their children from reality. But reality has a way of finding the unprepared.

xx, Teal

posted on Nov 11, 2010 8:34 PM ()

Comments:

Oprah had Tyler Perry, a famous black comedian on her show who revealed he had been molested when a child--then O followed up that show with another one where she had an audience full of men who had been sexually abused during childhood. None of them told their parents. Kids hardly ever tell parents for various reasons. You can tell kids about inappropriate touching etc. but when it actually happens they freeze up and it goes on.
Also, a psychologist on the show said 8 out of 10 children will have been molested during childhood!
comment by susil on Nov 15, 2010 9:58 AM ()
I am sympathetic to Elizabeth Smart, who has survived a horrendous ordeal. To your point, she testified in the court case that, early on, she made an escape attempt that failed, resulting in her being severely beaten by her abductor, who did threaten to kill her family if she didn't cooperate. Even so, I have wondered why she didn't make a royal scene in public, like in the library when the police man wanted to have her veil removed. I would have raised holy jumped up hell. Perhaps she wonders the same thing in retrospect.
comment by marta on Nov 13, 2010 5:21 PM ()
You are so absolutely spot on with this post. Being raped by a lunatic traumatized her, but how could she have been so indoctrinated by Stockholm Syndrome not to have run for help right away? I don't mean to be mean, but her father comes across as such a wimp, and the family is Mormon so maybe teaching resistance is against their beliefs or something.
I heard on the news that the nut caused scenes in court and seemed so crazy the trial is halted.
PS There is a visitor to my house who has three young girls and a live in boyfriend. I told her YOU CAN'T TRUST A MAN AROUND YOUR GIRL CHILDREN. Not "friends of the family" men, uncles, grandpa's cousins, neighbors, boyfriends, nobody.
comment by susil on Nov 13, 2010 12:35 PM ()
Su, you can't paint every man with the same brush. Of course anyone with young children (male or female)has to be watchful. And although it is hard to do, one must talk with one's children about inappropriate touching from any male and get them to feel safe in reporting it. You must know that a lot of women out there blame the child, or don't believe the child.
reply by tealstar on Nov 13, 2010 4:08 PM ()
Haven't been folllowing the revelations of this story, but I have wondered if the abductors told Elizabeth that if she didn't cooperate they would kill her family. I also wonder how much of the time she couldn't understand why her parents didn't come rescue her.
comment by troutbend on Nov 12, 2010 1:31 PM ()
I don't think these perverts were sophisticated enough to make those kinds of threats. I think they depended on divine terror as in God will getcha. Susil has a point -- if a child is brought up to never confront, always defer to adults, etc., that child will have a problem in this kind of situation. My parents also tried to indoctrinate me, but it just didn't take.
reply by tealstar on Nov 13, 2010 4:10 PM ()
We had two male teachers in highschool who liked to feel up the students.
I should have told my parents but instead I dodged all encounters with them. My grandfather molested two of his grandaughters (they were a meeker
more submissive type.)
comment by elderjane on Nov 12, 2010 5:55 AM ()
In a situation where you are forced to have contact with child molesters, it is better to speak up. In my case, the men were easily avoided. Also, my parents were so old country, it would have been disastrous for me. They would have locked me up and thrown the key away and I was determined to have my freedom.
reply by tealstar on Nov 12, 2010 10:02 AM ()

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