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Teal's Modest Adventures

Life & Events > Boring > Cooking, Gah, and a New Client

Cooking, Gah, and a New Client

When Ed and I got together in the 90s, I was in my 60s, widowed about 3 years and we started living together. At the office, there were general inquiries as to my plans and it came out that I cooked dinner. And they all looked at me in horror and said, “YOU’RE COOKING!!!”. And there you have the professional woman’s view toward traditional roles. All these years later, I am still cooking and the most dreaded words of the day, any day, are “what’s for dinner?” I am a good cook, have been known to make complex dishes and amaze people. I can do it but would rather it was an avocation to be indulged with when I am in the mood and a particular dish calls out to me. Mostly I would rather be doing anything else -- playing the piano, reading, writing political opinion, answering questions on Quora, that political opinion site that uses me and only pays the questioners, not the answerers. In a separate post I will showcase some of the more bizarre, and brain dead questions people are being paid to ask.

Ed and I jump started the Toyota and he drove us back to Gulf Coast Village, his first serious driving since the accident. It was his gas pedal leg that was damaged. We met up with his new client, Carmen, 72 and really sharp, and she signed some papers. Her son and his common law wife were sweet as cream to her but once she put his name on the deed of the house she had built, everything changed. She was belittled and yelled at. I think the “wife” was the influence. Nothing Carmen did was right. Then she learned her son was researching nursing homes for her. So one quiet day she slipped out of the house, visited Gulf Coast Village,and signed up for a buy-in to the independent living unit and if her money runs out, they will still care for her. If she leaves, she gets a refund. Then she packed and left. Residents noticed her sitting alone crying and learned what her son was doing so they talked to the staff, with whom Ed works. They met up in his room in the rehab unit and he got her on the phone with his guardian lawyer. She answered questions, times, money amounts, details, all without notes.

When he was finally released, I drove him straight to her bank and he got the son’s name off her accounts, got her to cancel his power of attorney, and has started a lawsuit to reclaim the house they stole from her. I wish I could see the son’s face when he realizes the jig is up. He had been telling the bank people that he had to handle everything because she was incompetent.

xx, Teal

posted on Mar 14, 2020 6:19 AM ()


It warms my heart to hear this story. Ombudsman work is very frustrating at times and the staff can be really nasty when exposed for not doing their jobs. Ed has my admiration for all he does for our one of our most vulnerable populations.
comment by donnaaa on Mar 16, 2020 12:08 PM ()
Geez, I've been cooking all my life and I even did a lot of it when I was with my ex. Guess it doesn't count too much now since if I left it to Donna I'd be eating oatmeal for dinner.
That business Ed does sounds about like an ombudsman that we have in NY but he does much more!
comment by jjoohhnn on Mar 15, 2020 1:22 PM ()
Oh now now, you know I'd put peanut butter in your oatmeal!
reply by donnaaa on Mar 16, 2020 11:56 AM ()
Before Ed became a guardian, he was a volunteer ombudsman and did a lot then, too. Sometimes he worked under the radar. Then Rick Scott became governor and apparently had flagged "unusual requests" so when the head of the ombudsman program requested information on the finances of nursing homes and other elderly facilities, he was fired. Then there were new rules: a senior with a complaint had to first notify the manager of the home in writing before seeing an ombudsman. Some compromised seniors are not even able to do that. Ed was so disgusted he quit and became a guardian instead.
reply by tealstar on Mar 15, 2020 8:17 PM ()
Hubby - What's for dinner?
Me - I don't know. What do you want?
Hubby - I don't know. You pick something.
Hot dogs for supper.
comment by janett on Mar 15, 2020 11:08 AM ()
I've asked Ed to make a list of dinners he likes because doing it and planning it and buying stuff is a full time job. Hot dogs would work because we sometimes just take off for Nathan's.
reply by tealstar on Mar 15, 2020 8:19 PM ()
How sad for Carmen to have to face the reality of her son's greed and lack of love. I am glad Ed was there for her and could retrieve her bank account and hopefully her house. what an evil pair to swindle one's own mother.
comment by elderjane on Mar 15, 2020 5:07 AM ()
Yes, I feel for her. She has another son, not helping, and a daughter who lives up north, but came to visit and support her mom. I don't know what it is with the sons.
reply by tealstar on Mar 15, 2020 8:22 PM ()
Yes, the son's face when he realizes the jig is up.
comment by traveltales on Mar 14, 2020 9:57 PM ()
things are moving slowly, but it will get done. Right now they just closed Gulf Coast Village - no one in or out - because of the virus. Sheesh.
reply by tealstar on Mar 15, 2020 8:26 PM ()
Bravo to Ed!!!
comment by marta on Mar 14, 2020 1:54 PM ()
Ed is a really good advocate and he often argues with doctors (he had two years of medical school) on their behalf. Most guardians have had no medical training at all and just wing it.
reply by tealstar on Mar 14, 2020 3:05 PM ()
Ed did a superman thing for her, makes me happy to hear someone looking out for people like that.
comment by drmaus on Mar 14, 2020 12:18 PM ()
He's got a good reputation. I'll tell him your superman remark. Sometimes he thinks no one notices.
reply by tealstar on Mar 14, 2020 3:06 PM ()

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