Well, granny-sitting is as entertaining as always. J's grandma is a real firecracker, and because she doesn't get out of the house, all her time is spent watching trash TV... so she's totally in the know of all the Hollywood drama, and forming her own opinions all along the way. "That Li-Lo, what a little bee-atch!" Oh, and watching Opera with her yesterday was a hoot, as granny starting spouting off her own sex advice. Gawd, did J ever cringe! I know she embarrasses the hell out of him, but I get a total kick out of her.

But because spending time with granny should take presidence over spending time blogging, I figured that in place of today's blog, I'd copy n' paste a little something off J n' my wedding website.

There is always two sides to every story, and so J n' I both have a page dedicated to how we met. It was kinda fun to see what each other came up with. I also thought it might be interesting to give you all a little insight into J's character by posting what he wrote.

So on that note... I call the following, "She Says/He Says".

She Says

It was my first day at FakeNameCompany, and my new manager was taking me on a tour around the office. After a visit to the supplies room, she had my arms piled high with all kinds of stationary that still sits unused almost five years later. En route back to my desk, we made one final pit stop into a dark room with covered windows. This grim dungeon was known as the Graphics department.

At the back of the room, tucked away in the shadows, was a desk decorated with strategically posed Todd McFarlane toys and a stack of Archie comics. Hunched behind the computer sat a serious-looking garçon who appeared to be in deep concentration. However, looking back now, I’m sure he was just in the midst of a paranoid clicking frenzy, minimizing all his un-work-related browsers.

“This is J,” said my manager. “J, this is Melodie. She’ll be our new writer over in Marketing.”

Despite the preceding blur of introductions with countless names and faces that I was bound to immediately forget -- this one felt different. Or at least I can safely say it was one of the few introductions that I can still clearly remember from that very first morning at FakeNameCompany. I recall feeling like the energy in the room changed, if only for a moment. Never known for being the most outgoing girl in the room, I simply smiled meekly and said, "Hi. Nice to meet you." I probably would have shook his hand too if I didn’t have to balance all these stackable paper trays, boxes of pins, paper clips, markers, highlighters, pens, folders and a notepad.

Unlike any of the other brief meet n' greets from earlier that morning, my match-maker manager decided to linger around J’s desk a little longer. “So J... why don’t you tell Melodie what you do?”

“I draw cartoons,” he replied with a subtle smirk.

The three of us stood there staring at one another in a moment of heavy silence. I waited for J to say more, but apparently he was simply too smitten to utter another word. ;)

Because we travelled in two completely different circles – his in the land of cartoons, and mine in the land of marketese – for the longest time there were no real opportunities for future conversations, which I suppose was just as well. I was in the process of a big transition at that point in time and cleaning house... so-to-speak. I was beginning to create a new life for myself, and a new relationship was the very last thing I was looking for.

Only the Universe knows when the time is right, and so it wasn’t until a few months had passed when I finally had a chance to have a real conversation with this mysterious J of few words.

It all began when N and L from Graphics invited me to attend the Spike and Mike’s Sick and Twisted Animation Film Festival. It sounded like fun, so I agreed that I would love to go. When I heard that J would also be in attendance, I was intrigued. Maybe I’d finally get a chance to see what this artist guy was all about.

The four of us met up in the theatre lobby, and after some brief mingling, we took our seats. Somehow I ended up sitting at the end beside J, (and as always, I also got stuck behind some pumpkin head who blocked the better part of my view.) Obviously theatre seating is not very conducive to group conversations, and even though I knew N and L well enough, I was still too shy to lean over and try to participate in the conversation. Besides that, I wasn’t familiar with this T character who the other three enjoyed venting about. (*Note to Greasies: T was an obnoxious guy they used to work with that no one liked. He was a common topic of conversation back in the day.) Instead I sat there staring into my lap and at the back of this pumpkin head sitting in front of me.

Fortunately, J was nice enough to make an effort and try to keep me included in the conversation as best he could. I shared a little bit more about myself, other than the fact that I work in Marketing -- and I learned a little bit more about him, other than the fact that he draws cartoons. While J originally seemed quiet and serious, I soon discovered that he had a wonderful sense of humour. He was articulate and intelligent, and his vast knowledge about movies had me impressed. “You love Forrest Gump? That’s my favourite movie too!!” Even today, I continue to enjoy J’s little impromptu film history lessons and explanations of shot techniques. I still find him as interesting now as I did then… even more so.

Again, despite my interest in J, at this point in time I was still very much enjoying my new-found freedom and loved nothing more than my time alone. I was thick in the depths of self-discovery, and had no interest in compromising myself for another relationship. And yet, I couldn't help but be curious... I believed that a guy as amazing as J wouldn't be single for long, that's for sure. I was conflicted. I wanted to wait, and yet I worried that if I waited too long, he'd be snatched up by another girl in no time. I decided that perhaps for now we could just be friends, and see where it goes from there.

Of course, that only prompted me to question how we could ever possibly form a friendship if we work in totally different offices, and never see each other. I knew that if I didn’t want another few months to fly by before we spoke again, that I would have to push myself outside of my comfort zone, and take some initiative to keep communication going.

The next morning I sent him a casual email, letting him know that I thought it was nice to meet him again. Eventually, over time, emails turned into conversations, which turned into spontaneous dinners at family restaurants, which turned into planned dinners at nicer restaurants that didn't have paper napkins… All the while, unbeknownst to us, we had a peanut gallery of coworkers watching and waiting for us to hook up. In fact, I think they knew what was going on long before either of us realized that there was anything was going on. I actually remember once asking a coworker, "So, if someone invites you out to dinner, but you both pay for your own meals, and then go right home afterwards... is that a date?" I was honestly clueless. I didn't know what to think... were we friends, or were we dating? They told me that it was a bit of a grey area, but they felt that it was probably a date.

Long story short, over four years later, and I guess they were right… because here we are today doing these little write-ups for our wedding website.

Obviously when I got my job with FakeNameCompany I never expected that I would meet someone so incredible who would exceed my expectations in every possible way. These last few years have easily been the best in my life, which is especially exciting since I know that the very best is still yet to come.

He Says

They say not to get romantically involved with a co-worker. On the other hand, statistics suggest that most couples meet through mutual friends, or their work environment, which certainly seems to be a healthier alternative to asking out random strangers in coffee shops, shopping malls, or the dreaded bar scene. (Which, to its defense, has been known to have 1-2 rare success stories.)
Having never experienced the ‘mutual friends’ scenario, it dawned on me – I need to get new friends.

Kidding.

In the year or two leading up to the attractive young blonde, (yes, I am talking about Melodie -- seriously) who would be toured around the Graphics wing of Kelowna’s FakeNameCompany (North America’s Leading Provider in Educational Tools, Products and Software), my dating life had diminished rather significantly from subsequent years past. While this could be attributed to an aging pretty boy’s charm not smiting a young lady’s fancy as it may have in former years of glory, this (then thirty) reflective man knew that should he ever wish to fulfill his passions, it would require more dedication and focus.

Of course that passion was filmmaking.

While I had been known to approach a stranger a time or two before -- whom I’d perhaps been curious about from afar in hopes of meeting someone sort of compatible -- by 2004, I had decided to somewhat rest my romantic notions on the proverbial back burner. Having completed my first professional short film and already becoming accustomed to writing, researching, or simply enjoying a Fri/Sat DVD ‘movie night’ to myself in the past two years, I saw how advantageous and satisfying my lifestyle had become. While I had a couple of dates in that time, nothing materialized and it was ultimately a low-priority, particularly as I understood the dedication required to break into an industry as challenging as the moving pictures. (Y'know... the "talkies".) I’ve never believed in following the rituals of societies’ status quos to a tee, so why should finding someone to marry be my mandate just because I was now closer to forty than twenty?

When it happens, it’ll happen.

And as it happened, I was whittling away on one of many digital illustrations that I’ve done for my employer of four years, FakeNameCompany (North America’s Leading Provider in Educational Tools, Products and Software), when, as foreshadowed above, an attractive young blonde, (yes, I am still talking about Melodie -- seriously) was given a tour of our Graphics nest by her new manager. I have to admit, my attention was somewhat caught by this fair damsel as she met with the other few artists in our hub.

Perched in the far corner, I had some time to prepare an introduction that had to be equally charming, witty, and confident, with a just a subtle shade of flirting that would not be obvious at first, but would later penetrate through the subconscious like a John Williams’ musical score. A line so clever in its deepest meanings, yet so simplified in its subtext.

“J, this is Melodie. She’s going to be working in Marketing. J’s another one of our talented artists. Why don’t you tell Melodie what you do?”

“I draw cartoons.”

…See what I mean? Clever, wasn’t it?

Fortunately, our communication did eventually evolve beyond three word sentences escaping from my mouth. While I was intrigued by her smile and her evident sweetness, I was a little leery in becoming attracted to a coworker. What might the consequences be if something developed? What if it didn’t work out? The snowballing thoughts discouraged me. Not to admit, I continued being apprehensive of getting involved with anyone. And who would want to get involved with someone who wants to spend his evenings working towards filmmaking, and weekends watching movies? And what if she didn’t like the movies I liked? What if she liked chick flicks and hated Forrest Gump?

Putting my romantic curiosities aside, I decided to call it ‘friends’. As it turns out, I hadn’t even made it that far. Melodie had actually become friends with my graphic work friends, N and L (I’m still not sure how that happened. Perhaps it was her way of getting closer to me? It must have been…) So I continued on with my life.

A few weeks went by when N asked me if I wanted to check out the 'Spike and Mike Sick & Twisted Animation Film Festival' playing at our local theater. You would think that as an animator with some professional experience and a fan of the animated and comedic genius that is 'Beavis & Butthead', I’d be interested in attending, but was instead leaning more to a pass.

“Hmm… Maybe. Who’s going?”

“Me, L and Melodie.”

“Who’s Melodie?”

“The new girl in marketing.”

“Ba.. Ba.. Ba...Ba.. Really??!”

Okay, that last line was my inner voice. The real response was along the lines of, “Yeah, that sounds all right. Why not?” with a half-yawn to boot.

Friday night came, and the four of us took our seats. As luck would have it, Melodie and I somehow ended up on the end, with me being the barrier between her and the two friends she had actually made at FakeNameCompany (North America’s leading provider in educational tools, products and software).

Over the course of the night’s twisted animated shorts, I got to know this young lady, and found her to be intelligent, sweet, with a sense of humour fairly in sync with my own. I was attracted to her, but still attested that it would be best if we remained friends. My ‘goals-distracting’ relationship concerns remained, along with the co-worker factor and implications of our possible liaison not working out. I put it out of my mind.

Time ticked on, and weeks passed. In this time, we bumped into each other once or twice, and even outside of the office as I would see Mel occasionally walking home, and offered her a ride which she was only too happy to accept. Once, I was even on my way to grab dinner in which she decided to join.

This sort of carried on for a while, and truth be told, I saw her more as a friend than someone to get involved with. I liked her mind and admired her humanity. And I continued on not wanting to be involved with anyone.

Or at least convinced myself of that.

After a few months of this, and time spent casually hanging out that was bordering classification as actual ‘dates’, I crossed the point of no return by initiating a first kiss -- which, unlike one of my awkward scarring teenage moments, was actually reciprocated upon the closing of my eyes. It seemed there was a mutual connection.

The rest as they say is history. As I write this four years later, I certainly don’t look back with any regrets. I’m in love with an amazing person who showed a world of patience in our first year as I got over my many insecurities brought on by having no real meaningful previous relationship experiences. I’m truly grateful for her tolerance and understanding, and we really have a fantastic little life together. We have excellent friends and loving families. We appreciate the same things in nature and enjoy challenging each other intellectually and philosophically. We have the same tastes in movies (a very important factor). And as of Aug 1st, we have since resigned as full-time employees of FakeNameCompany (The Leading… y’know…) with the aid of film financing which, over this next year, will allow us to bring our award-winning script closer to actual development. (Keep your fingers crossed for us).

Maybe my friends somehow knew this is how it was to be fated by NEVER having anyone both single and interesting in their circle. So, chalk Mel and I up as another happy statistic in love, who met at work - and not at the bar (not that there’s anything wrong with that). ;)