I have always insisted on the right to make my own choices. True, I have made a lot of mistakes and flouted convention a lot but at the same time if I made a mistake, I took the consequences without whining.

Rearing children, I tried to teach them that everything is about choice and there are always expected and unexpected outcomes with every choice.

Rigidity is hurtful. It hurts both the person who can't see another point of view and the person who has to cope with it.

Love should be unconditional. It shouldn't be "my way or the highway."

What brought this to mind, was an article about the difficulty of being a step parent. Discipline is sometimes necessary but I don't think the step parent should administer it. Leave it to the biological Mom or Dad.
Most of the time cause and effect will take care of the problem.