My free Mary Hunt newsletter “Everyday Cheapskate” contains an article today on how to "spring clean" your own car and save the $150 or so that it would cost for professional detailing. Well I had a headache before I even finished the first paragraph. This paragon of cleanliness has you removing all the seats (easy with the new cars, yes?) but, get this, the front seats too, and you might have to refer to the owner’s manual since they might have electronic devices attached. Owner’s Manual? Electronics? Get real. I am laughing all the way to the recliner.

Use a Q tip, she says, to get into crevices and around knobs. Vacuum, scrub, scour. Is anyone out there contemplating a career change? $150? I would gladly pay this amount to avoid this effort. Anyway, with Ed, the champion smoker, to deal with, the car would quickly revert to its natural state: grungy.

Show me to the guys who charge. I’ll watch, though.

Two days ago Ed and I went to Home Depot to get plant food. The plants that remain undead need help, desperately. A year ago Ed built a cement border around our large palm tree in the front, and filled it with exotic plants. They have all died and, being a wonderful helpmeet, I got into old clothes, knelt in the dirt, and dug out all the dead stuff, including the roots.

Ed had bought a “ti” (a flowerless plant consisting of long red leaves) at Home Depot and he then planted it near the base of the tree. We also reclaimed some still alive remnants of one of the original plantings that I trimmed down to fresh greenery. A large part of the “berm” is empty and we are scouting around for more plants. I have begged my prince to please not choose exotics, that need a lot of attention. The level of care we are wont to give is sadly lacking. We should, I said, get some stuff that thumbs its nose at over attention, or, frankly, any at all. When our plants die, Ed says it’s because they are getting too much water. I strongly doubt that. I point to luxurious plants adorning the lawns of other houses. They’re not getting as much wind, he says. No, I snarl, those people WATER. Pardon me for screaming. I would water but Ed has so far not arranged to put together a hose for the front and when I carry a bucket I have to rest for an hour.

I will post some pix when I take them.

xx, Teal