Teal

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tealstar
Name:
Teal
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Matlacha, FL
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09/26
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Married
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Publishing

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Teal's Modest Adventures

Life & Events > Relationships > People
 

People

Our friend, Lila, was in town to work with Chico’s and called us. We joined her for lunch at Coconut Point in Estero. It’s an elaborate shopping village with many streets and turns and nooks and crannies -- we got lost looking for Chico’s and I finally persuaded Ed to let me go into a store and ask. You know the story: a guy would rather slit his throat than ask for directions.

I did manage to buy a pair of pants at Talbot’s to eke out my wardrobe till I solve the tar problem on all my other stuff.

I don’t remember the name of the restaurant. All the names are cutesy-fancy, like The High Grape, The Diddledy Dawg. I thought I was ordering lightly when I had the burrito, but it was substantial. Of course I had a glass of wine. So tonight for dinner, I am having a slice of bread with peanut butter on it and nothing else. Well, maybe tea.

When we got home I napped because something about a Mexican style lunch does that to you. Later I biked. There’s a woman who is visiting her parents down the street because her mom is ill. She stopped me as I was going by and we chatted. The situation with her mom has depressed her and she is leaning on the sauce. She has decided I am a candidate for friend-therapist but the combination of drinking and neediness is daunting. Actually, it makes me want to avoid her even though the empathetic side of me realizes she needs a friend. I don’t think we have much in common, or by now I would have picked up on it. Our chats started when I commiserated with her on having to put her dog down for an incurable illness. Right now I can’t remember her name. The whole thing is awkward.

My friend, Leeanne, decided to cancel her Halloween party. Her reasons are convoluted. She lately has been very volatile – not with me, but with other friends, and has decided she doesn’t want to party with a bunch of drunks. So I will stick around the neighborhood and maybe Debbie, my neighbor, who is working to get more people up at this end, will appreciate some help.

Ed said why shouldn’t I be friends with this woman, since I am friends with Leeanne, who fights to stay sober and who is bipolar, a tricky mix. I said, whatever else goes on with Leeanne, she doesn’t lay it on me and she is not needy and she thinks I am the most interesting woman alive and I do like that in a person. He doesn’t like that she is free with her favors but I have said, “You can’t catch that and if she was a guy, you’d think, ‘way to go.’”
So it goes.

xx, Teal

posted on Oct 24, 2010 7:01 PM ()

Comments:

That's the one good thing about being a man. In general, we're more social loners. Our friendships consist of sports and cars (which I hate). Nothing "needy". At least that's what I think. Does Ed have a best friend? I don't.
comment by solitaire on Oct 27, 2010 6:31 AM ()
My serious relationships have not been dominated by sports-obsessed guys. Jay liked sports but he wasn't hung up on them. Anyway, it's my experience that guys have their needy sides but mostly hide them. Or suck it up. That doesn't mean they're not hurting. You may be the exception. But there's no attraction in being with someone who doesn't on some level need you in a serious way. Elsewise, you might as well be the wallpaper. In order to have a best friend, you have to be one. This goes for both genders.
reply by tealstar on Oct 27, 2010 12:12 PM ()
I know what you mean about needy people. I have learned to flee them even
if I need company.
comment by elderjane on Oct 25, 2010 4:38 PM ()
There is nothing better in the world that having a friend who thinks we are the most interesting person in the world. We all need someone like that, even if it has to be a cat or dog, but hopefully we can find a person or two with that opinion.
comment by troutbend on Oct 25, 2010 1:44 PM ()

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