Call this venting time. Who else can I unload on but my fellow mybloggers-ites?

My father wanted a traditional cook-out for this holiday weekend, so, despite my offer to host, we gathered at my sister's (easier that way somehow) last evening. Just four of us.

I brought some chicken and sausages to grill (just for dad and me. Sisters ate tofu), a potato salad, asparagus, and strawberry shortcake. "Complaints" all around as usual. Sausage was "too spicy", chicken "a little burnt". Salad had snow peas in it ("not like Mom made it"). Shortcake was "dry". Etc. I just gritted my teeth--and seethed.

This was all after I "had words" with father. Before supper, I sat down to talk with my sisters, lawn chair in the shade, but eventually in the sun. Our dad joins us and calls me "big dumb" for being in the sun (90 deg). As I always have done, I defended myself. Then I said, "You know dad, you've called me (and us) "big dumbs" all our lives. It's demeaning and degrading and insulting. In your remaining years, do you suppose you could refrain from calling us that?" His response was, "Do you know where I got that phrase from?" No apology or agreement. He ignored my request.

As conversation progressed, he proclaimed he always had a positive and encouraging attitude. I couldn't let him get away with that. Not only has he been EVERYTHING BUT that, he's been the exact opposite. He never fails to call my son a lazy bum. He constantly brings ups the failures in my son-in-law's construction business ("housing market collapse is no excuse"). Not to mention my SIL ought to get a real job and get out of this sustainable farming hippie thing.
He was vehemently opposed to me loaning them money to move a house and take over the farm ("You can kiss your retirement money away." They've since repaid me.).
Anyway, I raised my voice (beyond normal, since he's hard of hearing) in defense of us and in countering his proclaimations. "HOW CAN YOU SIT THERE AND MAKE JUDGMENTS LIKE YOU DO, AND CLAIM YOU'RE POSITIVE AND ENCOURAGING?!!!! I'VE NEVER ONCE EVER HEARD YOU SAY YOU WERE PROUD OF ME OR EVEN LOVED ME, FOR THAT MATTER!!"
I then left to tend the grill. We all ate pretty much in silence--at least I did. I just listened to father complain about the food.
There's a part two to this "blow up", but I'll save it for the next post. Thanks for listening.