Today I'm feeling in a much better place than I have in a few days. And I think it's really important to recognize that when I am in a positive state of mind, I can find some meaning to what I'm going through and I can find reasons to thank God right now (while I'm still in the storm, waiting for the rainbow).

A List Of Meanings Or Praises I Have (right now, even with every going on)

1. I've been given the time, support and the educational resources to get better from the depression (bipolar) I've had all my life. This wouldn't have happened if I hadn't been forced to resign. I would have kept pushing myself. And if I would've been able to finish teaching the rest of the year, I wouldn't have had health insurance to be able to do what I am now in partial hospital.

2. I'm learning a lot of people are supporting me, people that I don't really know well and for the first time completely ...my parents. But I'm also learning the people who were never friends or even caring towards me from what I can see. These are primarily people from work; people who are usually very supportive when other department members are in any sort of crisis.

3. I'm learning to slow down, stay in the moment, do one thing at a time and be mindful while you're doing it. (Although my relapses are many because I am in very early learning stages).

4.I'm learning that I have to meet my own needs. I can't ignore them and I can't expect someone else to meet them for me. Also, I can't meet my children's needs until I get well and take care of my needs.

5. I've learned characteristics of healthy and unhealthy relationships and also attitudes and behaviors that I have which interfere with me making and maintaining healthy relationships.

A short list for now, but I know there are more!