Well I thought I would try to write a little. I think this desk is cursed or not in agreement with feng shui. I don't know, but since we moved here last year this desk has almost always defeated my writing. Maybe it's the clutter??? I don't know I think I need all of this stuff, I mean won't I ever need a used Snickers wrapper again? Maybe, I think I will hold on to it and the empty can of soda. That can is worth at least .0000001 cent, I think.

So anyhow here we go.... A masterpiece is just waiting to leap from my brain and dazzle all those who happen upon it.

Any minute now....

I have already learned I can never ever try to think funny. The funniest crap seems to be the junk, like the wrapper and can that I carry around in my mind just in case.

Have you seen the show HOARDERS? That is the inside of my head. I have heaps of decaying junk stuffed in every corner. None of the drawers will shut and the bathroom is now storage for my collection of National Geographic magazines. I hope there are no dead pets hidden among the old soup cans and numerous empty packs of cigarettes.

Oh no I have started thinking of the pets. I had a frog named Greg, well my daughter had a frog named Greg, but like all of the others like my friends cat Fluffy which was mine and my brothers cow named Charlotte which was in fact MINE...

Every time she got off her leash who do you think had to chase her down? Yes that's right ME! Do I look like chasing cows? Well looks may fool you, because I did NOT! F that cow.

(For those who may think that I am not telling the honest truth, well I am. Who could make up a cow on a leash.)

I never wanted anyone from school to know about the run away cow that living in the back yard.

One of the worst days of my life to date was the day when that cow (with snapped chain dangling from her collar) had me trapped in an not only old but wrecked car when I was waiting for the school bus and wouldn't you know that is when the bus would pull up and the driver,Peggy, jumped out and lured the deranged cow away from the car.

It was a long ride to school. The secret had been let out of the bag after that the kids who had always called me the ever endearing name "Mudd" (which is my last name)then began to call me "MOOOOOD".