I don’t like to tie shoelaces, so I flop around unless it’s really important. Well, now that I am wearing low boots, I do tie them. I don’t like to empty the dishwasher. I don’t like clearing the dining table, that Ed dumps stuff on, before I can serve dinner. I don’t like having to vacuum or mop, or sit on the floor scraping stuff up that won’t come off any other way. I don’t like putting the trash out. Cleaning kitty vomit off the carpets is tedious. I don’t mind trimming bushes but when I do it, I spend the next day in bed. I won’t eat anything breaded. What’s the big deal with tea? It is uninteresting. Red wine is not a taste. Drinks I like: margaritas, white wine, martinis, and really strong coffee.

Sidebar: I got sick on scotch when I was 16, got home at 4 a.m., sat on the landing planning the moves that would get me into the house without alerting mother. 1) insert key in lock, 2) open door 3) dash into bathroom and lock door. I had to plan this seemingly simple task because I was really bombed. I made it a fraction of a second ahead of Mom. I wouldn’t let her in so she went back to bed. Then I got into the tub because porcelain is the only thing that helps when the room is spinning. And ever since, I only drink white things.

Drinking margaritas in Trader Vic’s (located in the Plaza sub-basement) with the Plaza bellmen and the airlines clerk from the Plaza travel desk one fine afternoon, made me understand how someone could black out. It turns out I am tequila tolerant, so I can drink several margaritas without getting sick, so I lose track of time. We sat down at 5, more staff showed up, hey, hi, and when I checked my watch a few minutes later, it was 11. Who knew. Now if it was martinis, I would have thrown up by the time I had the third. In those days I worked for a management consultant with offices in the 22 House, a narrow six-storey townhouse next to the hotel, connected through the basement and serviced by hotel staff. And often, when I bought the morning paper from the newsstand in the lobby, I’d run into celebrities – Ted Kennedy, Maximillian Schell, Gary Merrill, Don Ameche, older but still looking great, Henry Fonda … later I took ballet class with his daughter Jane but we only spoke once, in the dressing room, when I zipped her up. Honest.


P.S. I just looked up Trader Vic's. When Trump bought the Plaza in 1993, he called it "tacky" and closed it. Another reason to despise him. Google Trader Vic's -- There are photos.

xx, Teal