I do the New York Times crossword every day. The News-Press buys it from the NYT Syndicate I used to work for. Tempus fugit. Monday is easy, and the puzzles gets progressively harder each day until the Saturday one, which is impossible, and in order to solve it, you’d have to be on intimate terms with the creator’s psychiatrist. Sunday’s is medium hard and is usually my fave. On the reverse side of the Sunday page, there is the Los Angeles Times puzzle which I also like.

Here are three examples from the NYT Sunday puzzle from last week and I am thinking this puzzle maker has a mental problem and should be institutionalized.

Definition: Fable about smoked salmon? Answer from the solution page: Locksmith. So Locks for lox and mith for myth. Get it? This is the only one I psyched out.

The following two are still a mystery.
Definition: Raised some vegetables? Answer: groupies
Definition: Belts for a Chinese leader? Answer: mousetraps

So when I run into several obscure definitions in one puzzle, I have no misgivings nor do I self-flagellate, nor feel guilty about “giving up” or in any way see my dumping it as evidence of a lack of character. So I toss it. I don’t have time to spend on the output of people who are truly deranged.

Now if anyone reading this understands the answers and says, “yes, of course, that makes sense,” then forgive me if I pray for you and you know what that’s worth, because I’m an atheist.

Snarl, Teal