For over 30 years I have been very fortunate to have as a neighbor "Ms. Lilly" living across the road from me. She died a few days ago and I've been thinking about her.

Ms. Lilly was a widow with two grown sons; she was in her 80's and had lived alone for many years. She was an exceptional, extraordinary person and the finest neighbor anyone could have. What makes for a fine neighbor?
First was her personality. Neither she or I were the "sit down and drink coffee and chit chat together" kind of people. She was reserved and you might not believe it, but so am I.
I would plug up the land line phone when the lights went out (which is often) and first thing I'd do is call Ms. Lilly to tell her I was calling the power company so she wouldn't worry about having to. Then I'd ask how have you been and she'd say in her soft kind voice "oh, okay." And she'd have said that if there was an arrow sticking in her leg. She was NOT a complainer, never, about anything.

She accepted whatever came her way in life with such dignity and equanimity. I honestly believe if Satan had shown up red and steaming on her doorstep she would have said in her quiet calm way "Would you like to come in and cool off?" "Want a cookie?"

Another thing I admired was that she was always so neatly dressed and well groomed. She had a hair appointment every Thursday. She was a nice looking woman, tall with good posture and manners that the shlumps around here didn't deserve; maybe that's why she never remarried. She was better than the doofusses here.
She was a good neighbor in that she didn't have a dog or dogs running loose in the neighborhood pooping on my yard and peeing on my car tires (it is her D-I-L next door who does.)There were never any loud party sounds, no motorcycles revving up, nothing intrusive or annoying from her house. And she kept her yard and house as neatly as herself.

She was discreet and dignified and kept her own counsel. She was a real lady, a true lady and I told her several times that in the dictionary next to the word LADY should be her picture. A lady doesn't have to be born and bred into English aristocracy, on very rare occasions a natural lady of the finest ilk comes along, even in backwoods Mississippi. You could have put her in a fancy hat and white gloves at the royal wedding and she would have had as much aplomb and natural composure as any blue blood.
Goodbye, Ms. Lilly.

susil