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Life & Events > Bull Dykes and Bleach Bottles
 

Bull Dykes and Bleach Bottles

I've been watching the Food Network show "America's Worst Cooks." There are two teams of terrible home cooks--each team of ten is led by a well known chef. Each week someone is eliminated off each team. Sunday night was the semi finals--all had been eliminated except the two home cooks who had shown the most improvement. The finalists had a loved one come on and cheer them on. The winning cook on one team was a lesbian, a sweet nice looking girl. Her cheerleader was her "wife," a butch dyke.

Now this is what puzzles me about that whole scene. If a female doesn't want male lovers, why choose a fat dyke-y looking woman that looks like a man? Why not just get a fat man instead? I remember Jody Foster's photo in a tabloid with ther partner, a fat dyke-y woman. I mean if you're gonna go gay why not choose a pretty woman instead of the butchy ugly women? I think women who choose these mannish women are looking for a mother and/or father figure, all wrapped in one.

Now about those damned bleach bottles--Clorox bottles to be exact. They have those child proof caps. You're supposed to push down and twist to open. Well! I tried and tried to open a bottle and no way was it gonna open. Geeze! I was annoyed to the point that I took a butter knife and heated it up on the stove and tried to pry the cap off, thinking the hot knife tip would soften the cap up. What it did instead was melt a hole in the jug at the top, and in the process, I burned my hand next to my thumb. Damn! So To seal the jug up, I had to put duct tape over the hole. Some bleach brands just have a pull off tab on top which works better.

Then I bought some Lysol gel toilet bowl cleaner with the swan neck you can aim under the rim. So! I followed the directions to push in the top and twist to open it. No gel would squirt out. I pounded the top on the porcelain of the bowl over and over, then took a pair of scissors and dug out what ever was sealing up the squirt hole, getting the stuff on my arm in the process. (The directions for opening the thing was printed on the side of the bottle in teeny tiny white print on a pale blue background. I defy anyone even with 20/20 vision and a magnifying glass to decipher that teensy writing.) Whomever is sitting in those product development meetings in big corporations oughta have Clorox and Lysol gel spurted on them and actually try to open what they're approving to send out to the public.

susil


posted on Feb 14, 2011 11:31 AM ()

Comments:

It may be free speech.But I sensed hate in there and this is a big difference than free speech.
comment by fredo on Feb 27, 2011 5:31 AM ()
I sense, given your choice of words, you are a trifle riled up from your Clorox and Lysol exasperation and exposure. To each his or her own.... Nevertheless, I used to do battle myself with such bottles and caps until I started making my own green cleaning solutions. Cheaper and no poison control caps.
comment by marta on Feb 20, 2011 5:30 PM ()
marta, you are one smart lady. I've tried the green products but the only one that worked well was the window cleaner.
reply by susil on Feb 26, 2011 9:05 PM ()
So true on all accounts! I keep meaning to watch "Worse Cooks", but forget. I still enjoy "Chopped".
comment by solitaire on Feb 15, 2011 6:16 AM ()
Hi sol; I watch the Food Network shows a lot, esp. Chopped, and every time I get hungry and wind up eating something--watching TV will put the pounds on ya!
reply by susil on Feb 26, 2011 9:07 PM ()
When I worked at the battered women's shelter, I worked with a lot of lesbian couples. They despised men but invariably one half of the couple
dressed like a man. It puzzled me. Sex and love is a puzzle. We can't
be judgemental because we simply don't know the whole story on human behavior but it is fascinating all the same.
comment by elderjane on Feb 15, 2011 6:16 AM ()
Hi jeri; fascinating and none of my business, I know.
reply by susil on Feb 26, 2011 9:10 PM ()
On the bottle issue! Find an eight-year-old! They can open them in no time at all.
comment by redimpala on Feb 14, 2011 9:49 PM ()
Hi red; yep, get a little kid to do it--they wouldn't have any trouble.
reply by susil on Feb 26, 2011 9:12 PM ()
Don't get me started on modern packaging. You'd think they'd at least make the opening instructions visible. I wrote one outfit several letters and they eventually changed the package (I wasn't the only one complaining). I used to open the bottle by totally destroying the original cap with pliers and then replacing it with a regular screw-on cap. As for couples, who knows what turns anyone on. Wouldn't be my choice, certainly.
comment by tealstar on Feb 14, 2011 7:32 PM ()
Hi teal; and thanks for the protests about the packaging--maybe if a lot of people would raise cain about ridiculous product opening procedures then folks wouldn't have to use pliers and hot knives to break into stuff!
reply by susil on Feb 26, 2011 9:17 PM ()
Never saw that show, but have had some trouble with the bottles to the point of using a pair of pliers.
I strongly disagree about gays being born that way(JMO)
comment by larryb on Feb 14, 2011 4:46 PM ()
larry, if you lived closer I'd call you to bring the pliers and open things for me..
reply by susil on Feb 26, 2011 9:20 PM ()
hormone make-up is key to homosexual behavior. I was medicated with a hormone cocktail containing testosterone for a serious condition many years ago. It's the only time ever I had lesbian fantasies. The med stopped, I got "normal".
reply by tealstar on Feb 14, 2011 7:27 PM ()
You forgot to say 'not that there's anything wrong with that' - supposedly makes it all better. I saw a couple like you're talking about in the casino last night. The one was clinging onto the girly one, like I've never seen even hetero couples do outside of a high school parking lot. The girly girl totally ignored this person wrapped around her, managed to look like she had no idea who that was.
comment by troutbend on Feb 14, 2011 12:22 PM ()
Hi; I'd better avoid that subject--I was in a snide mood when I wrote that blog (since I had just wrestled with opening those da*n containers and was irritated with everything!)
reply by susil on Feb 26, 2011 9:24 PM ()
pesky bottles!! David doesn't like bleach so I use Baking soda in my laundry now.
comment by panthurdreams on Feb 14, 2011 12:00 PM ()
Hi to you and David--well, I can't do without my bleach. Nothing can take its place for disinfecting and cleaning. I use it for the white clothes laundry, squirt some on my bathcloth, soak my feet in warm soapy water with a bleach squirt in it--you'll never have athlete's feet if you do that--use a squirt in the dishwater, etc.
reply by susil on Feb 26, 2011 9:28 PM ()
well not sure that this is the right thing to say.You are going to make a lot of noise on Bull Dyke.You seemed really hateful toward these people.
You do not go gay.Born this way.You need to learned more about this.
Choice of words there/Be careful.
comment by fredo on Feb 14, 2011 11:50 AM ()
No fredo, just my opinion, no hate. This is the USA, not Libya. If a person can't say something on their mind, might as well give up right to free speech.
reply by susil on Feb 26, 2011 9:32 PM ()

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