I was thinking about the timing of contacts from my sister after reading angie's post about women and abuse.

It was two years ago that we exchanged a number of emails that ended in us breaking contact. She called in tears maybe it was a year ago, saying her husband was being abusive, and wanted to know if she could come stay with us. I was shocked, but willing to be supportive and agreed, but she said it hadn't come to that yet, but would let me know.

I think it after that she started sending emails catching me up on stuff at her end. With her recent illness, she's looking for more support. My email to her was to clarify that I she didn't want to see Dolly, my wife, and that my issues with her and her husband not acknowledging my experience with "our family" were still out there.

I looked at her response this morning. I've written about it before, but while she wrote "how's that for not ignoring the feelings", she did exactly that. She expressed her dislike of Dolly and how it stems from twenty years ago and how I should support her now, but she wrote nothing about my past concerns and didn't even acknowledge my apprehension about how visiting her without Dolly would be awkward.

Dolly wants me to contact my aunt who is visiting my sister this week to explain the situation: why I'm not coming down to see her while she's here. I think that, even though she's probably being indoctrinated against me, it puts her in the middle of our conflict, which should really be between us.