Randy

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solitaire
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Randy
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Par For The Course

Parenting & Family > Fatherhood > Sunday Picnic
 

Sunday Picnic

I just have to relate the family gathering at my house a couple of days ago.
My daughter and husband that lives in Honduras is "home" for two days before flying to Iceland for a vacation. (Why Iceland? My SIL likes to do weird things-for attention.) (It's paid for through church donations from the U.S., but that's another story.)
So Sunday was the only day the whole clan could meet. An old-fashion cookout was in order--I supply the house and food for some reason.
My two sisters came, plus our Dad. My other "local" daughter with husband and son were here. (The two sons-in-law barely speak to one another.)
And, to add to the "dysfunction", my ex-wife was invited (not by me!). I don't need to report, it was crazy.
Somehow, I became the brunt of "attack" by daughters, sisters, father, and ex. It was teasing, but hurtful. Things like me not running my dishwasher but twice a year (when company comes). (Why need to? Hand washed is easier and cheaper.)
But, I survived. Nobody was maimed. Even Dad was civil (more or less). Two daughters stayed overnight and that was good.
Then I babysat yest. Yes, I'm here on a Tuesday to tell about it! Whew!

posted on Aug 7, 2012 8:50 AM ()

Comments:

Oh fun, at least you can't get them all together very often. I hate teasing. I think it's always hurtful. And if you just have to tease, then do it once and stop. Don't keep going. I think my mother's teasing, picking, etc did some damage to me.
comment by crazylife on Aug 21, 2012 9:08 PM ()
Yes, I recall some things you've said about your mother's biting tongue. My father called my sister a "shrew" the other day. True (at times), but ouch!
reply by solitaire on Aug 22, 2012 4:40 AM ()
On the other hand, some people, apparently like your dad, feel superior when they can point out your omissions. Their self-esteem takes the path of needing to be constantly bolstered by knocking others down. They are to be pitied. Sometimes I respond by saying, "Thanks for your opinion. Do you feel better now?"
comment by tealstar on Aug 9, 2012 4:27 AM ()
True enough. My sisters are good at that.
reply by solitaire on Aug 9, 2012 8:11 AM ()
Oops, I wrote a book down there.
comment by jerms on Aug 8, 2012 2:35 PM ()
Shocked about the donations going for a vacation to Iceland. We would have never been allowed to do that when we were doing that kind of work. It actually hurts the cause by inciting distrust. I wonder how he gets away with it. As for the ribbing, I'm the whipping boy in our family. Every time my brother comes to town, he and my other brother and even my parents chime in to pick at me. I try to take it good naturedly, even if their remarks are spot on truth and a bit stinging. I just pipe up and ask them who is going to be the victim tomorrow.
Why don't the SIL's not speak to each other? It's not like they live so close they have to maintain a close personal relationship every day. Once in a while should be a piece of cake. Who knows?
comment by jerms on Aug 8, 2012 2:35 PM ()
Hey Jeremy. I assume they go on vacations (Machu Pichu last year) on "donations". They receive a pittance from Clinic fees. I don't ask for fear of instigating some fierce retort. I don't remember reading about any trips in their newsletters, so it's hush hush. As far as the SILs, let's put it this way, one makes a living on donations (charity), the other by hard manual labor (organic farming). Grasp the difference? It also has to do with they each see "fatherhood". Good parent/husband, bad parent/husband (farmer good).
reply by solitaire on Aug 9, 2012 8:11 AM ()
Why *do* the SIL's not speak to each other?
reply by jerms on Aug 8, 2012 2:36 PM ()
Did you tell them that it hurts? Maybe they think it's all in family fun. Sometimes you will tease someone you think it does not faze.
comment by tealstar on Aug 8, 2012 5:08 AM ()
I try to go along with it. For example, in cooking the hamburgers, my father ALWAYS brings up my overcooking them--ONCE, long ago. So I tell him to expect his burger to be burnt to a crisp--just the way he remembers it. Shuts him up.
reply by solitaire on Aug 8, 2012 1:21 PM ()
Did your family ever hear about not looking a gift horse in the mouth? Not that you are a gift horse. But here you are, offering your hospitality to them and there they are, being rude to you, even if it was in a teasing manner.
comment by boots586 on Aug 7, 2012 11:54 AM ()
I think their good-natured ribbing is their way of saying thanks. Maybe not. Like I've said before, my ex told me last year that leaving me was the biggest mistake in her life. And no, I'm not taking her back!
reply by solitaire on Aug 8, 2012 1:18 PM ()
One plate, one bowl, one fork, one knife, one spoon. It takes days to fill up a dishwasher. I have a very small dishwasher and I used to run it twice a week.
comment by boots586 on Aug 7, 2012 11:49 AM ()
And a cup for iced tea. Now if I do some baking, that's different. Still easier to wash by hand. Thanks for the "support".
reply by solitaire on Aug 8, 2012 1:16 PM ()
Well... you are quirky, I am sure your kids pick on ya for it. We do that to my dad as well. Glad you survived!!!
comment by kristilyn3 on Aug 7, 2012 10:04 AM ()
I suppose I am--but (hopefully) in a good way!
reply by solitaire on Aug 8, 2012 1:15 PM ()
Iceland is a very interesting country.She will or they will loved it.I have not been there but told that this is very challenging.


You have it all and glad that it is you.
comment by fredo on Aug 7, 2012 9:12 AM ()
Iceland isn't exactly on my "bucket list", but if offered a free trip, I'd go! Eager to hear what they see and do.
reply by solitaire on Aug 8, 2012 1:14 PM ()

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