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The crowd, who has tossed back more than a few beers, gather around a make shift platform festooned with red, white, and blue bunting and pictures of the smiling candidate giving peace signs, Nixon style. Bugg steps to a bank of microphones with logos of all major news organizations(NBC, CBS, CNN, Reuters, The National Enquirer). The crowd cheers wildly and chants "WE WANT BUGG...WE WANT BUGG".
"Thank you thank you, mah fella Amuricans. Thank you all for coming and thanks too, to our hostess with the mostest, Elkhound, for organizing this event." Elkhounds steps up, blushes, waves and bows to the cheering crowd.
"So are y'all having a good time?" Everyone whoops, claps, whistles. Some drunken wag yells "we were until you showed up."
"Thanks, Mom. We gather here today to enjoy good food, good drink, and good company, at this the first official MyBloggerstown community party. Only in Amurica, my friends, do we have the freedom to assemble here like this. But our freedoms are being threatened. The current administration has set on a course of a monsterous power grab, that is stripping away our precious rights in the name of "security". My friends, Benjamin Franklin said it best when he told us that those who give up freedom for security get and deserve neither. And he was a very wise man. The winds of change, they are a'blowing, mah fella Amuricans. This election reflects this merely by the field of candidates presented. We have a woman, an African American and, yes, an insect vieing for the highest office in the land. Only in Amurica. And the only candidate for real change is standing before you today...yer own Bugg." Wild cheerng, whooping, foot stomping whisling and waving placards saying BUGG FOR POOBAH. "I represent you, the small town, bitter schmuck, that Mr. Obama dismisses.... you, the parent who worries about sleeping children at 3 a.m. and you the displaced worker who have lost his/her/its jobs to downsiding and failed immigration policies. Yes, my friends, in the words of the immortal Sam Cooke...change is gonna come. And its gonna come on little Bugg wings. We are going to end this insane war that is robbing us of our best and brightest and draining us of our rescources that could be better used. We are going to invest in Amurican jobs for Amuricans. We are going to revitalize our decrepid educational system. We are going to provide health care for every citizen. And we are going to throw up border fences, deport all illegal aliens and patrol our ports. Its time the gub'ment thought of its citizens first and under the Bugg Administration this change is gonna come. Its a big job, Amurica and it won't be easy but I ask you....can we do it? YOU BET YER ASS. That's right, mah fella Amuricans, you bet yer ass we can and we will. We will restore Amurica's place as a leader of the free world, the shining example for the nations of the planet in emulate. And the great Amurican middle class will rise again. So, my friends, come election day, you know what to do. When you are in that booth alone with yer conscience, vote for the only candidate who dares to lay it on the line.....the only candidate for you, the forgotten middle class...the only candidate for real change. Vote early, vote often, and vote for BUGG."
The crowd cheers and waves "YOU BET YER ASS" signs. Suddenly a car backfires and Bugg dives under the platform yelling "Duck, everybody, the snipers are shooting at us again."
