Sometimes it's so hard to pick a title. Since I usually write about my feelings and the daily happenings, I guess status quo was the first thing that came to my mind. Meaning that I'm just doing what needs to be done (no more, no less). But yet at work at least, maybe not at home, I feel like I have to work twice as fast as I normally do just to do the bare minimum.

My neck and shoulders have been aching and hurting like crazy for quite a few days. I was told before that it's the part of my body which carries my stress. I did a yoga dvd on Sunday but haven't done it again since then.

My mom and dad want me to fly Kevin down to Florida alone since we can't all afford to come down. I'm not opposed to it and Kevin wants to but the reality is that I don't even have a credit card I could put it on. I know it bothers her that she can't just buy it for him, but my parents are really struggling financially. I wish she wouldn't beat herself up about it and I wish she didn't have to get all upset with me when I can't do it either.

Times are tougher than I've ever seen them. Big meeting after school today about budget and our "ideas" on cutting expenses. I think most people would be really surprised at how much red tape one has to go through to even start steps that would save the school an immense amount of money. I obviously can't go into details so you'll have to trust me on this one.

I'm kind of getting used to Kev living with my ex and that in itself is pretty sad. I can't believe I'm saying that it's becoming normal to me that I don't have my 8 year old son living with me. He's been sick this week and he was sick a couple weeks ago as well. He sounded so sad on the phone tonight. A said it was because he had so much homework to catch up on due to his absence.

Marissa made honor roll and effort roll for the marking period. She's been pretty quiet the past couple of days. She's sick too. I hope that's all it is. I'm afraid of her getting depressed too. I know she's affected a lot by my depression.

I've been feeling nauseas off and on today. Honestly I think this is stress too.

I've had so many breaks from school lately and the next one is only two weeks away. And yet I can't wait. But worse, I don't have much hope that it's going to help me feel better.