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Teal's Modest Adventures

Life & Events > Boring > Coping


Ed used to do stuff to keep the house and grounds nice, but he hasn’t been up to It following his illness last year, although he is back doing guardian work.That means visiting lots of people and driving hundreds of miles every month. He recently lost two wards he was very fond of. Dorothy, whom I also liked, is gone and was flown to Massachusetts to be buried with her first husband. And Bill, a former Merchant Mariner and marine during WWII, which made me wonder if he had ever known Jay, who was a radio offier on a Merchant ship at the same time. Losing them has triggered sadness and Ed has been moping.

A while ago someone dropped off a flier offering house sitting and general handy work and I kept it. So when Ed was complaining about things falling apart, I said do you want to try this guy. So we called him. He is about 60 but looks older and I thought he might not be up to things. But he started work and is doing well. We had a dip in our driveway pavers that he fixed. He and Ed will clean out the garage. I am amazed Ed is finally getting to that. Amazed. He was going to charge $12 an hour and the curmudgeons said, I’ll give you $15 and he is giving him cash every day and he is very grateful. Ed, I think, related to his unhappy circumstance of having to work so hard at his time of life.

When the plumber replaced the water heater, we moved some shelving and other stuff, including a really heavy filing cabinet, out of the way, and he didn’t put any of it back. As a result, I wasn’t able to unload groceries from the car to our cart, and had to make several trips. So now that Tom is helping, we have cleared a path and as soon as the shelves are back, I can have my cart back. Things is good.

Meanwhile, I found a box in which I had stored a handwritten diary from the 70s and 80s and have been reading it. Blogging and writing political opinions seems to have replaced the need for keeping a diary. If I am ever reincarnated and write a diary again, I will be sure to be specific about the people I write about because all these years later, they are a mystery. And I’m thinking, hey, I worked with these people, how come I don’t remember them? I was also using the diary as a writing study, trying to hone my skills, and I was reading a book that said if you are inclined to write down your dreams, you are more an essayist than a novelist. Well, that’s me.

It is also a sad trip down memory lane because Jay was beginning to fail and I write about that. I may stop reading this and just burn it all. It isn’t something that someone will discover and think, hey, this is a book. Trust me, that ain’t happening.

xx, Teal

posted on July 1, 2019 10:39 AM ()


It is wonderful to have a reliable handy man who is probably old enough to have a good work ethic.
comment by elderjane on July 4, 2019 1:37 AM ()
"buried with her first husband" suggests that there were additional husbands. What a snub of the others to go back to the first!
Donna and I attended a 6-sesson chronic pain workshop last fall and we decided that we will stay in this house. So I did everything I can think of to make life easier. It ddin't require much more than making a few landscape modification and buying a few inexpensive tools. I will split the last of the firewood before winter and from now on I'll buy it cut and split. That will only require a few hours of stacking, not days and weeks of splitting.
Donna retired as a volunteer ombudsman for the elderly after 10 years of service. I think time spent in the nursing home was getting to her more and more as she got older in less mobile. My volunteer project for the last nine years has been 4C Camp for Adults which does tend to service an older population, but they are the active, mostly healthy seniors so I don't find it depressing.
comment by jjoohhnn on July 2, 2019 6:11 AM ()
Scott had a bad reputation even out this way. "Right to work" I think was the major issue before he was elected (or reelected). Yup, bad news.
reply by jjoohhnn on July 3, 2019 11:10 AM ()
Dorothy was alone when she passed, so So I guess her 2nd husband didn't know her choice. Your story was interesting. Ed was an ombudsman before Gov. Rick Scott trashed the program, forced nursing home residents to notify the nursing home manager if they needed to see an ombudsman or make a complaint, fired the head of the program when he issued a request to see who owned the nursing homes. Before he was governor, Scott was the head of a hospital corporation. He's as corrupt as they come. So Ed quit and became a guardian. He has an MBA from Boston U and 2 years of medical school so he is uniquely qualified. A mental health facility here recently asked him to be their guardian advocate and wanted to pay him. He's doing it pro bono.
reply by tealstar on July 2, 2019 11:45 AM ()
Sorry, I didn't mean to write a book!
reply by jjoohhnn on July 2, 2019 6:12 AM ()
A wonderful thing to see - progress on the to-do list around the house.
comment by traveltales on July 1, 2019 8:08 PM ()

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