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Some my posts lately have been about confidence and Janet has reminded me that I have a "need" for validation of my feelings.
Confidence from self-esteem. About two years ago I posted something about self-esteem. Apparently, I have not made much progress on mine. I haven't even thought about it. On one web page, "Low self-esteem causes depression, unhappiness, insecurity and poor confidence. Other's desires may take preference over yours. Inner criticism, that nagging voice of disapproval inside you, causes you to stumble at every challenge and challenges seem impossible" (https://www.more-selfesteem.com/self_esteem.htm).
I continue to have issues with this, but it slows me down and causes stress.
It comes from my childhood when I learned to fear punishment for doing things wrong instead of learning self confidence. I think I'm less depressed and unhappy than I was then, but it remains something that I need to work on in the present.
I know her and I know she never meant to give you another reason to beat yourself up. It's not a fault to desire validation for your feelings. That's human nature. And when our feelings and thoughts and experiences aren't validated as children, during our most formative years (and I'm sparing you some chakra talk), the need for validation only increases. All that Janet was suggesting is that your validation might need to come from some place other than your family since they don't seem too interested in acknowledging your experiences. And that being dependent on their validation might make things worse for the same reason.
I need work in this department as well...
I have spared you. Believe me.