Sexy Sadie

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Sexy Sadie
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Can't Buy Me Love

Life & Events > Relationships > New Year Catch Up
 

New Year Catch Up


I've been absent because I've been in a funk. I've been trying to pull myself out of it but it's there. I felt much better yesterday evening but then tossed and turned all night. Lots of things are weighing on my mind.

One of them is Thom and our future. Can't really elaborate, I really like him but sometimes it's frustrating because I don't know where I stand with him. In more than a year he has not once said that he loves me. Do I love him, yes, but I am not head over heels in love with him. Where does that leave me? Tossing and turning.

Another is money. Of course, Money! The root of all evil and the thing I don't have enough of. I'm tired playing the balancing act between bills, food, supplies, and things I want... which isn't much but right now relates to fitness. Yes, my fitness habits are pricey. And where does that leave me? Tossing and turning.

And then there's the few pounds I put on. Sure it's just 4-5 messily little pounds but after working so hard to drop 55 last year, it's frightening to see a few come back. Again leaving me tossing and turning.

So what can I do to make things better, in the short term? Well, I've done my best to cut back on spending and my hard work on that is starting to show. Thom? Okay, I admit it. I'm just gonna keep going with the flow for now.

Side Note: Thom and I had a quiet NYE at his place. We ordered Indian Food, drank wine and champagne, ordered Hellboy II on PPV, and kissed at midnight. We did go for my first official bike ride on New Years Day... after I nagged him to get off the couch. LOL

So the 4-5 pounds? Yeppers! I CAN make a difference on that one.

So I'm back to counting my calories for the first time in more than a year and joined the Spark People Challenge New YOU Bootcamp. Which so far really feels like it's working not just physically but mentally.

Of course the online workout videos require a stability ball and mine deflated last night and won't hold air anymore. But I won't be defeated ... or deflated! I will just bite the bullet and buy a new one.

So here's to the new year and a new attitude.

posted on Jan 6, 2009 11:55 AM ()

Comments:

The weight is nothing. As far as Thom goes, it's more important that you are happy. However remember that you are putting valuable energy into a relationship, and not getting what you want back. It sounds like you are selling yourself short. If you are alway with him, how are you ever going to find the one???
comment by kissy2008 on Jan 7, 2009 1:31 PM ()
I am sorry that you've been funtastic. Celebrate life each and every day! I know that the new year brings many questions and doubts. I was with SD for a year and half. I told him I loved him and he told me he did not reciprocate the feelings. Then he came back and asked me to love him again but did not return the favor. Yes my problems... but the moral of my story is that you have to figure out what is right for you, for thom and the universse. I shall stop going on and on and on.
comment by spicybitch on Jan 6, 2009 8:01 PM ()
You should have name the title to this.
Tossing and Turning.This I will say Men not sure but they sometime are afraid to say "I Love You"not sure why.Maybe it is a macho thing with them.
Does not feel nice when they do say this.But then again we have Men are from Mars I guess.Hell!I do not know what I am talking about.
But then again.Oh!what do I know.I love you.
comment by fredo on Jan 6, 2009 12:36 PM ()
5 pounds is easy compared to 55, right?
comment by stiva on Jan 6, 2009 12:21 PM ()
Sounds like Thom is going with the flow with your relationship. would you rather be with someone who is committed and you both are head over heels? ... hard to find, of course.
comment by stiva on Jan 6, 2009 12:20 PM ()
Sorry you have been in a slump sista!
sometimes things can certainly pile up on us and yeah, it does leave ya tossing and turning unfortunately - but I am glad you are doing your best to get out of it!!!
I saw your spark page post about the working out... YOU GO GIRL!
4 - 5 pounds... I can understand the concern but I am glad you called them measly, cuz they are!
comment by kristilyn3 on Jan 6, 2009 12:06 PM ()

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