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New Year Catch Up
New Year Catch Up
I've been absent because I've been in a funk. I've been trying to pull myself out of it but it's there. I felt much better yesterday evening but then tossed and turned all night. Lots of things are weighing on my mind.
One of them is Thom and our future. Can't really elaborate, I really like him but sometimes it's frustrating because I don't know where I stand with him. In more than a year he has not once said that he loves me. Do I love him, yes, but I am not head over heels in love with him. Where does that leave me? Tossing and turning.
Another is money. Of course, Money! The root of all evil and the thing I don't have enough of. I'm tired playing the balancing act between bills, food, supplies, and things I want... which isn't much but right now relates to fitness. Yes, my fitness habits are pricey. And where does that leave me? Tossing and turning.
And then there's the few pounds I put on. Sure it's just 4-5 messily little pounds but after working so hard to drop 55 last year, it's frightening to see a few come back. Again leaving me tossing and turning.
So what can I do to make things better, in the short term? Well, I've done my best to cut back on spending and my hard work on that is starting to show. Thom? Okay, I admit it. I'm just gonna keep going with the flow for now.
Side Note: Thom and I had a quiet NYE at his place. We ordered Indian Food, drank wine and champagne, ordered Hellboy II on PPV, and kissed at midnight. We did go for my first official bike ride on New Years Day... after I nagged him to get off the couch. LOL
So the 4-5 pounds? Yeppers! I CAN make a difference on that one.
So I'm back to counting my calories for the first time in more than a year and joined the Spark People Challenge New YOU Bootcamp. Which so far really feels like it's working not just physically but mentally.
Of course the online workout videos require a stability ball and mine deflated last night and won't hold air anymore. But I won't be defeated ... or deflated! I will just bite the bullet and buy a new one.
So here's to the new year and a new attitude.
posted on Jan 6, 2009 11:55 AM ()
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