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I know you all think I've not got a mean bone in my body. I really try to supress the 'mean gene' and be Miss Mary Sunshine . . . most of the time.
However, now that a few weeks have past and probably the people involved are not literate enough to read much less blog...I will confess to what I did at our Wal-Mart two days before Christmas.
I was standing in line waiting to pay for my usual haul of cleaning stuff, Cokes, a couple of cans of soup and other things I just could not live another day without. The lines were long and tempers and patience ran short.
Behind me was a screamer child that appeared to be around four years old. Old enough to be acting much better than she was. Every 2.5 seconds she screamed to the top of her lungs, "TOY!!! I WANT A TOY NOW!!!" Had that been my child...the stitches would have come out in 7 - 10 days and combing the hair to the other side would hide the thump on their head. What did this "Mom of the Year" do? Scurried around trying to pacify this spawn of Satan with tidbits of cheap crap that is at every register.
I held my tongue. I crossed my legs to keep from running. I tried to hum a mantra that would calm my soul and keep me from being on the local "news at 11".
Hee hee hee...I saw a chance and grabbed for it like a wino at a beer tasting party! The mom stepped away to try to get another offering for the demon child. Oh yes...I was within a foot of her sitting in the cart doing her chant. I leaned over on the pretense of picking up a box of tissues and said directly into her ear: You know Santa is watching and hears you. Too bad if he thinks you are on the bad list and skips your house this year.
It was as though the Heavens parted and angels swept down from above. The child went totally silent as she grasped the reality and seriousness of the situation.
Mom came back with some coloring book or something equally cheap and was met with, "No, Mommy...I'll wait on Santa".
The look on the mom's face was priceless. The feeling in the depths of my soul was priceless. The silence from the shopping cart was priceless.
No one knew or was wise to my little ploy. I smiled at the child and as I left the check out line I wished her a Merry Christmas and told her I hoped Santa would be very good to her.
Then I got into my car and laughed the laugh of the insane for several minutes.
Oh yes...we do get that one bright and shinning moment when the planets line up and the stars are in our favor.
Mz Scarlett...ain't your Mary Poppins gal.
