"Love It Or List It" is one of my favorite shows. I'm always rooting for Hilary, who is a designer trying to help people solve some of their house problems so they can fall in love with their homes all over again. David is a real estate agent trying to find them a house that works better.

I've had a love/hate relationship with most of the homes I've lived in, at least until I could resolve some of their issues. I really relate to these families. Like me, a lot of them have unfinished projects piled so high that loving it is impossible, and listing it is not feasible.

With my current house, listing is not an option, and not just because of the amount of work that still needs to be done. It's kind of like the proverbial 'family farm', you just don't want to be the one to let it slip away. The house is something we'll most likely pass on to our children when we die, hopefully in a lot better shape than how it was when we got it.

I grew up in California. I remember watching others sell their modest ranch houses and move to some other location where the proceeds from the sale would buy them a mansion. Made perfect sense to me! However, without fail, someone would mention "You know you'll never be able to come back..."

I'm not sure that is the case anymore. Seems like the rest of the country has pretty much caught up with California in property values. Now that I've lived somewhere else, I can honestly say that I don't want to live here for the 'duration'. But having a foothold here is still a good investment, and will be useful no matter how we end up using it.

Our animator son would love to be able to live in it if he could get a job at Pixar, which is within commuting distance. I've also heard that my future son-in-law might want to get his PHD in San Francisco. Those are just 'what-ifs', but they'd be made more possible by hanging on to this house. At the very least, it'll make a nice rental as this is a very high demand area.

Until then, we need to be here, mostly for MIL, but it serves other purposes just fine. My daughter is thriving at her school and in her dance classes. I'm enjoying the weather. We could never manage these projects from a distance! And I think that creating some distance between us and our more needy adult children will help them become more independent.

I can't say wholeheartedly that I love it yet, though I'm definitely grateful for it! The floor plan is taking some getting used to. I've decided to change nothing in that department. It's also on the small side, just under 1400 sq ft. I think that ought to be big enough for three people... provided they aren't pack rats, which we are!

I know now that if we don't get a handle on it, no amount of space would be enough. This house serves as a gage for my progress. I'll consider myself 'cured' when I've pared things down enough to fit easily and comfortably into it. I've accepted that there will be no mansions in my future, I have to deal with what is.

With the recent boxes of books and accessories that I've unpacked, I'm afraid I've tipped the scales in the wrong direction. I've filled a total of 13 bookcases and still have books waiting for a home. My book cases are low, cuz I'm not fond of books at eye level, and I feel it will be safer, should we happen to have an earthquake. Still, it's kind of like the square footage of the house, if 13 book cases aren't enough, no amount will be!

So... back to sifting and sorting and culling and hauling. I just have to keep reminding myself that I really can... LOVE IT!