I had just gotten layed off...again..back in 1996. I had not had this "good job" all that long and was so low on the seniority list that any little slowdown found me back at the unemployment office. I was feeling pretty low because I was 39 years old and had been a rolling stone as far as my employment record was concerned, but had finally landed a decent trucking job, and now I was layed off...again. My wife, very very timidly said, "we need to talk, I have something t tell you." We had had a somewhat rocky marrige up till this point so the possibilities running through my mind in a milisecond were many. I braced myself and said something like, "ok, what's up?" Then she hit me with the two most powerful words I had ever heard in my life. "I'm pregnant."

Oh my God, I thought. NOW? NOW, your pregnant! Although children had been part of "my plan", it just never did seem to be in the cards so I had begun to let that part of me begin to fade a bit I think. I was now 39 and didn't know how this was gonna work out. Suddenly I'm doing math in my head, I'll be 60 when she's 21. I'll be 45 trying to teach her to ride a bike. I'll be in my 50's when she's a TEENAGER! Oh boy, this is gonna be a big job, am I up to it? Well, not being someone that would even consider abortion as an option my only thought was, you better GET up to it!

Well, the day Bill Clinton got elected for the second time, I was in a room with my wife blowing into her contorted face while she looked at me with eye's like saucers, filled with incredible fear at what she was going through. Lamaze class now all but forgotten, all she wanted me to do was blow in to her face the same rythum she was blowing out. It must have been hillarious to the nurses but it was serious business to us. Somehow, blowing in her face made her feel better, I naturally obliged as best I could. I thought I was going to hyperventilate but compared to what she was going through that was small potatos.

It all started at about 8:00 am that Tuesday morning and now at 9:30 at night the big event was at hand. The obstetician readied for the final push. "PUSH!", she said...my completly worn out frightened wife looks at her like "what the hell do you think I've BEEN DOING BIT*H! Anyway, my daughter is plunged in to this world at 9:30 pm. All covered in muck and blood, the most astoudingly beautiful creature ever imagined by man. I did not know, and you don't either if you don't have kids, just what capacity we actually have for loving another human being. I would literally walk through fire, fight a bear hand to hand, you name it to protect this little life.

"You want to cut the cord?" the doctor asks. "Sure I say", hoping I don't pass out. Snip and my daughter is free, a stand alone entity....I'm a Dad! Ten fingers, ten toes, all red and looking ticked off like you just interupted her favorite show or something. A little squeak of a cry (she got much better at that). She was so tiny, but they assured us that she was fine and all was well. I don't think my wife was ever more beautiful than right after my daughter was born. Hair all mussed up and sweaty but a glow to her face. Completly exausted, thankful I think, to be alive. We were now parents.

I just finished helping "my baby girl" with some math homework. Much like that day all those years ago when my wife hit me with those two blockbuster words, "I'm pregnant", I still wonder sometimes, "am I up to this?" Being Rebecca's Dad has been the most ongoing wonderful experience of my life. I honestly don't know how we survived all those years without her. I think she has taught me at least as much as I've taught her, probably more. Because of our relationship I'm better able to understand God as a "loving" Father. I am so very grateful for the gift God gave me that day. That's why I'm writing this one, out of a heart of gratitude. I'm the luckiest guy in the world!