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Just in case you had not considered!
City Hall in San Francisco
( A scene at City Hall in San Francisco )
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'Next.'
'Good morning. We want to apply for a marriage license.'
'Names?'
'Tim and Jim Jones.'
'Jones? Are you related? I see a resemblance.'
'Yes, we're brothers.'
'Brothers? You can't get married.'
'Why not? Aren't you giving marriage licenses to
same gender couples?'
'Yes, thousands. But we haven't had any
siblings. That's incest!'
'Incest?' No, we are not gay.'
'Not gay? Then why do you want to get
married?'
'For the financial benefits, of course.
And we do love each other. Besides, we don't have any other prospects.'
'But we're issuing marriage licenses to gay and lesbian couples who've been denied equal protection under the law. If you are not gay, you can get marriedto a woman.'
'Wait a minute. A gay man has the same right to marry a woman as I have. But just because I'm straight doesn't mean I want to marry a woman. I want to marry Jim.'
'And I want to marry Tim, Are you going to discriminate against us just becausewe are not gay?'
'All right, all right. I'll give you your license'.
'Next'.
'Hi. We are here to get married.'
'Names?'
'John Smith, Jane James, Robert Green, and June Johnson.'
'Who wants to marry whom?'
'We all want to marry each other.'
'But there are four of you!'
'That's right. You see, we're all bisexual. I love Jane and Robert, Jane loves me and June, June loves Robert and Jane,
and Robert loves June and me. All of us getting married together is the only waythat we can express our sexual preferences
in a marital relationship.'
'But we've only been granting licenses togay and lesbian couples.'
'So you're discriminating against bisexuals!'
'No, it's just that, well, the traditional idea of marriage is that it's just for couples.'
'Since when are you standing on tradition?'
'Well, I mean, you have to draw the line somewhere.'
'Who says? There's no logical reason to limit marriage
to couples. The more the better. Besides, we demand our rights! The mayor says the constitution guarantees equal protection
under the law. Give us a marriage license!'
'All right, all right'.
'Next'.
'Hello, I'd like a marriage license.'
'In what names?'
'David Deets.'
'And the other man?'
'That's all. I want to marry myself.'
'Marry yourself? What do you mean?'
'Well, my psychiatrist says I have a dual personality, so I want to marry the two together. Maybe I can file a joint income-tax return.'
'That does it! I quit !!
You people are making a mockery of marriage!!'
