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Can Always Use a Smile! Lol
Can Always Use a Smile! Lol
The Washington
Post has published the winning submissions to its yearly contest, in which
readers are asked to supply alternate meanings for common
words.
And the winners are:
1. Coffee , n. The person upon
whom one coughs.
2. Flabbergasted , adj. Appalled by discovering how much
weight one
has gained.
3. Abdicate , v. To give up all hope of ever
having a flat stomach.
4. Esplanade , v.To attempt an explanation while
drunk.
5. Willy-nilly , adj. Impotent.
6. Negligent , adj.
Absentmindedly a nswering the door when wearing
only a nightgown.
7.
Lymph , v. To walk with a lisp.
8. Gargoyle , n. Olive-flavored
mouthwash.
9. Flatulence , n. Emergency vehicle that picks up someone who
has
been run over by a steamroller.
10. Balderdash , n. A rapidly
receding hairline.
11. Testicle , n. A humorous question on an
exam.
12. Rectitude , n. The formal, dignified bearing adopted by
proctologists.
13. Pokemon , n.. A Rastafarian
proctologist.
14. Oyster , n.. A person who sprinkles his conversation
with
Yiddishisms.
15. Frisbeetarianism , n. The belief that, after
death, the soul flies
up onto the roof and gets stuck there.
16.
Circumvent , n. An opening in the front of boxer shorts worn by
Jewish
men.
posted on May 22, 2009 7:36 PM ()
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