"Double
Life", subtitled 'A Love Story From Broadway to Hollywood', is written
by Alan Shayne and Norman Sunshine who will be celebrating their 54th
anniversary this July 2012. They take turns telling their story from the time they met in 1958.

Many
years ago I read a study about gay couples and one of the conclusions
was that when there was a 5 year or more difference in ages the more
likely the couple will succeed in their relationship. Joe was 20 years
older than Albyn and they were together for 55 years before Joe died.
There was 15 years difference between Robert and James and they were
together for 50 years. Whether the conclusion is correct or not I don't
know but I do know that most relationships lasting over 50 years that I
know of have been between gay men. The only long term heterosexual
relationship I know of is my brother and sister-in-law who have been
together close to 60 years.

Alan
was an actor in New York that, while I was reading as he talked about
his credits, I realized I had seen him in 2 plays but I have no memory
of him. At that time Norman was making a living as a free lance
illustrator. Alan is older than Norman and even though I googled them
both I could not find out how much younger Norman is nor, considering
they are 'famous', there is very little about them on the Internet aside
from this book.

After
he gave up acting and became a casting agent Alan then was the
President of Warner Brothers Television for 10 years and after produced a
few TV movies. Norman got involved with advertising and coined the
phrases and campaigns for "What Becomes A Legend Most?" and "Danskins
Are Not Just For Dancing." He would go on to become  a painter and
sculptor whose work is in museums and private collections.

I
was 26 when they met and I found many things about their life, such as
not coming out as a couple in Hollywood until the 90s, sort of strange
since I was already out all over the place. As far as I can tell they
slept in separate beds in separate rooms even at what I would call
momentous times as the first time they slept in a country house they had
bought together or the time Alan went to London where Norman was and
went back to his hotel room to sleep.  Is that where I made my
mistake--sleeping with my lovers?!?!

Even
though he tries to play it different I found Alan to be a little over
bearing, more of a name dropper than Norman and the main money maker for
most of their time together though later in life Norman seem to come
into his own as an artist. Alan also writes about twice as many
chapters.

During
most of their relationship they seem to have lived well with homes in
Beverly Hills, Malibu Beach, Bucks County, Washington, Connecticut,
apartments in New York, separate studios for Norman for him to work in,
to name a few places. They got married in 2004 in Massachusetts and seem
to be living happily ever after.

It
was interesting traveling along with both men as they got deeper into
their relationship and Norman, more than Alan, doesn't hesitate to talk
about some of the problems they had along the way. Reading a letter Alan
wrote to the New York Times, that was never published, and the last two
to three chapters of the book when they talk about their love for each
other is very moving. They talk about sex, fidelity, promiscuity and how
they handled/felt about the subjects.

There
is a quote, that I can't find, by a guy who basically feels like I do
that a long term relationship means compromise, fidelity and
selflessness, all the things not in my make up.

I
am glad gay men are getting away from coming out and/or AIDS stories,
though both are still needed, and getting into successful long term
relationship books as young people today have to know they not only
exist but have existed for many decades. Now it is time to hear from the
women!