My daughter is 44 years old, and every time we get on the phone she she soon reverts to a whiney sounding 10 year old who berates and blasts and accuses me of being a horrible booger of a mother when she was growing up.
In her mind, I am a cross between a Medici and Cruella de Ville. Why? Because I had to work all the time when she was growing up. She doesn't see this as a form of love--that someone worked like a dog to keep her fed and clothed and a roof over her head. I divorced her alcoholic father and had to work to support myself and my two little girls.
I know it wasn't easy for them. I didn't know what else to do but work. Somebody had to. As soon as the oldest got out of high school she married a guy with mental problems who keeps the pot boiling and instigating this mother hostility--I can't believe my smart pretty daughter would act this way on her own.
It's gotten so bad I don't accept phone calls or letters from her husband due to their vile hateful nature. They aren't allowed to visit because every visit has been so horrible. But yesterday, my daughter phoned and I answered
but quickly, she started that bad mother thing again. I have cut the umbilical cord. They are free to go their way and I'll go mine. At my age, all I want--and feel I deserve--is some peace and quiet. I just wish she could find some peace herself.
susil