Two years out of law school I left the Public Defender’s Office and went into private practice with a guy who already had an ongoing practice. This was in 1974 and topless bars were the rage. There were several in our city and we took them on as clients. They were always getting harassed by the police and railed against by the bible thumpers. I had never been in one myself but one day my partner says to me, “Let’s go visit the titty bars.”
My response was something like, “Do we have to?”
“It’s legal research,” he said, smiling.
So off we went and, believe it or not, we took our wives with us. They were both curious. When we got there, the first order of business was to stand just inside until our eyes adjusted to the darkness. We were led to a table by a smiling young lady wearing very little clothing, all of which was below the waist. I imagined that the owner of the place had said to her, “It’s the lawyers; show ‘em what you got.”
The music was about as loud as standing next to a jet engine. We ordered beers. Then the music stopped and different music came on for the dancer that took the small stage to perform. She commenced to dance provocatively around a pole.
“Freedom of speech,” I told my wife. She gave me her “oh please” look. And speaking of facial expressions, the one on the face of the gal dancing drew my attention away from the rest of her. Her look was one of complete boredom, what the psychologists would call a flat effect (not a reference to her anatomy). Although she was performing what was supposed to be an artfully suggestive dance, her face reflected total lifelessness.
“She doesn’t look like she’s enjoying herself very much,” my wife said.
As for me, I was wondering what anyone would see in such a listless performance. Gypsy Rose Lee she was not. We finished our beers and moved on to the next client’s bar. It was essentially a repeat of the first place. I realized that my own imagination was preferable to actually watching these poor wenches gyrate on stage. The Supreme Court may have somewhat inexplicably labeled this “free speech,” but if that’s what it was, it was monosyllabic at best.