We went out last night, there we were dressed and ready to go to the party. We turned on a night light, turned the answering machine on, covered our pet parrot and put the cat in the back yard. We phoned the cab company and requested a taxi. The taxi arrived and we opened the front door to leave the house. As we did, the cat we had put out in the yard scooted back into the house. We didn't want the cat shut in the house while we were out, as she always attacks the bird. My wife goes out to the taxi, while I go inside to get the cat out. The cat runs upstairs, with me in hot pursuit. Waiting in the cab, my wife doesn't want the driver to know that the house will be empty for the night, so she explains to the taxi driver 'My husband will be out very soon; he's just gone upstairs to say goodnight to my mother.' A few minutes later, I get into the cab. 'Sorry I took so long,' I said, as we drove away. 'That stupid bitch was hiding under our bed again! I had to poke her with the sharp end of a wire coat hanger to get her to come out! Then she tried to take off, so I grabbed her by the neck when she tried to bite me. Then, I had to wrap her in a blanket to keep her from scratching me But it worked! I whacked her arse with her pooper-scooper to calm her down and finally managed to haul her downstairs and threw her out into the backyard for the second time. Even the parrot was screaming: "Get the bitch, get the bitch!"

The cab driver hit a parked car.