This year's record number of tornadoes is incredible. What is the reason? (Probably the fault of the "liberals," right?)

China has suffered a very strong earthquake in Szechwan Province. On top of the devastating Burmese (Oops! They changed their country's name to something that sounds like "Meow Mix."), the disaster index is way off the top of the chart this year. (Damned Liberals again! LOL)

Manchester United took the English premier League honors. Now that's a true disaster!

I'm not poking fun at tragedies like the world is suffering. We are all in for it.

Just go shopping for food, gasoline or a mortgage, and you'll understand.

Last night I watched Extreme Makeover again. The program really shows what can happen when people (good ones) give something of their time and expertise to people who are down and out. Although full of sentimental content, that program is a standout among the kinds of shows TV puts out these days. The bulk of TV is awful. I got my fill of "live" reality TV after watching the very first one about ten years ago.

We've been spared the tornadic storms this year. By the time those fronts arrive in Ohio they are merely clouds choked with rain. As for the precipitation, we've had double the average.

Mom's Day was spent doing mostly nothing. My hamstring is not improving very fast. I spend a lot of time watching baseball, reading or lying down. Golf looks very far away.

I took my Mom to brunch and loaded her up with presents. Mostly clothing sent from my Sister, a few things I got her, and food. She will be 90 Wednesday the 14th. I am taking her to Olive Garden in Findlay for dinner. Mariah promised to go along.

I'm trying to paint again. I left off in late March with four canvasses ready to go. I'm painting pigs. More on that phenomenon:

Here in bible-belt Ohio I figure nudes won't make the grade. Pigs, however, right here in the heartland of premium pork production, are hot. Besides, they are cute. Pigs are very painterly things. I'm enjoying it. The pigs don't mind, either. When I go to a farm with cameras, the little ones rush to the fences. They like the attention, but I think they really want to eat the cameras. I read somewhere that pigs are almost as smart as chimps. I never worked with any real chimps, however, so I can't confirm that.

I really feel for the people whose lives have been devastated by the weather. Here we are years after Katrina and the people of New Orleans are still wondering how to put it all back together. The destruction in OK, KS, MO and Arkansas is horrible. I realize that tornadoes have also hit other places.

I never worried about twisters when I lived in Long Beach, CA. But one day a small one blew through a couple blocks of stores a half mile from my house. I couldn't believe it.

This is a cold Spring. After the long, cold, snow-packed winter, I expected early warmth. Not. It may only get to about 50 today.

Will somebody please quit the Presidential race so we can get back to the important things, like Lindsay Lohan, Miley Cyrus, and even maybe some more news about Ms. Spears?

Enough already!

I think the secondary schools should have a course in practical living. It should teach real-life things instead of aiming at standardized tests questions. It should teach things like:

1. Most shoes come with laces. Tie them before every job interview. If your shoes aren't tied you won't get the job, kid.

2. Never pass or cut into a funeral procession on the street or highway. I shows your profound disrespect for others and the law which forbids it in most states.

3. Wipe your nose on a tissue or handkerchief, not you hand or sleeve.

4. Never strike your children with your fists.

5. After about ten o'clock every evening, stop screaming at the top of your lungs. Some people have jobs and are trying to get some sleep.

6. Sleeping with your radio turned on will make you sterile.

7. On second thought, leave the radio turned on, kid.

I read about another case where the image of the Virgin Mary was found on a piece of fruit. One time I found the image of Elvis on a slice of toast, but I was hungry and ate it. Think of all the cash I could have made exhibiting it at one of those Elvis memorabilia gatherings! I could have charged fifty cents for people to look at it. But it was early in the day and I already had the peanut butter on the bread knife.