A man escapes from a prison where he's been locked up for 15 years. He breaks into a house to look for money and guns. Inside, he finds a young couple in bed.
He orders the guy out of bed and ties him to a chair. While tying the homeowner's wife to the bed, the convict kisses her neck, then goes into the bathroom.
While he's in there, the husband whispers to his wife, 'Listen, this guy is an escaped convict. Look at his clothes! He's probably spent a lot of time in jail and hasn't seen a woman in years. I saw how he kissed your neck. If he wants sex, don¢t resist, don't complain. Do whatever he tells you. Satisfy him no matter how much he nauseates you. This guy is obviously very dangerous. If he gets angry, he'll kill us both! Be strong, honey. I love you.'
His wife responds, 'He wasn't kissing my neck. He was whispering in my ear. He told me he's gay, thinks your cute and asked if we have any Vaseline.
I told him it was in the bathroom.
Be strong, honey. I love you, too..