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As
we get ready to set up our tents for another PrideFest we should take a
moment to congratulate each other on how far we have come. For a
weekend we will proudly “strut our stuff”: tattoos and earrings, biceps
and pecs, drag and leather, tight shorts and cowboy boots, gaybies in
strollers, pets on a leash, colorful wife beater tank tops, the
soundtrack courtesy of Lady Gaga. We shall hold hands and kiss our
"husbands" and "wives" while walking through the booths representing our
community newspapers, magazines, bars, clubs, gay friendly
establishments, gay businesses, civic associations, gay organizations,
all proudly flying the rainbow flag, basking in the Florida sunshine.
And
of course, between a cocktail and a hot dog, a bag full of trinkets and
a raffle, we will pat each others on the back and say: "Yes, there is
nothing wrong with being fabulous".
If cigarette companies were
allowed to promote their ‘fags' Virginia Slim would have a great booth
emblazoned with their slogan from the 70's, "You Have Come a Long Way,
Baby.” Even though our city, inexplicably, did not make "The Advocate’s
Top 15 Gayest Cities in America" all things considered, we are fortunate
to live in Greater Ft. Lauderdale/Wilton Manors.
Yep, we are fabulous... but immensely jaded, bordering on uncaring.
While
we show off our Balenciaga belts we never think about how the other
half lives in the Bible Belt. Out there, in the Hinterlands and the Deep
South, gays and lesbians of all ages, especially teenagers, are living a
nightmare of fear and depression. Important protective factors such as
family love, community support and safe schools are completely missing.
Growing up is scary when there is nobody to relate to.
Thus, many of them contemplate suicide, as the only way out of pain.
They
are caught in a time warp of religious intolerance, alienation and
disconnect, open discrimination and bigotry. They are made to believe
that hell is waiting for all gays, that we deserve AIDS that we are one
step removed from bestiality, that we are not fit to act as parents or
even be upstanding productive citizens. They do not boast, like us, of
having 150 friends on Facebook. They do not know first hand what a
Pridefest is. The closest thing for them is the annual Big Chili Cookout
at the County Fair.
While there are many progressive Christians
around the world with a true sense of compassion and moral integrity,
the oppressive Bible thumpers of mid America are the product
of outdated, suffocating, traditional Christian values that prefer
ritual to reflection, obedience to individual discernment, meaningless
confessions to genuine atonement. If we catch them on a good day, and
find them in a condescending Christian mood, they will tell us:"Dear, we
hate the sin, but love the sinner".
In its highest form,
Christianity is a test of one’s mettle, a challenge to live in the image
of Jesus, the incarnation of all virtues. In its lowest form, it’s a
spiritual Wal-Mart, where absolution comes cheap and the swallowing of a
wafer, a Sunday service or a candle and a prayer are all it takes
to even things out with God. Those repressed gays and lesbians, far
removed from South Florida, and from the Top 15 Gayest Cities in
America, are living in fear and without foreseeable hope.
They
have no concept of what the pursuit of happiness is. With time they
become captive slaves of their own self hate and low self-esteem. They
are so used to disguise themselves to others that in the end they become
disguised to themselves.
On the other hand, fabulous out and
proud gays are too complacent. We should be up in arms demanding
comprehensive laws to protect all sections of society- with no
exceptions. Our agenda should be setting the pace of social change by
demanding a ban on all forms of discrimination, true and enforced crack
down on hate crimes. Prevention programs for sexual minorities should be
put into place and tackle issues of stigma, labeling, bullying, plus
safe and effective referrals.
The Trevor's Project is on the right
track, but it's not enough. Furthermore, nobody's life should be
dictated by a Church, a Government, or by a majority vote of the Supreme
Court. The time has come for our own Tea Party instead of another
T-Dance.
With this I'm not saying you should not enjoy the
upcoming Pridefest, by all means dance your socks off, get moderately
smashed, come by SFGN's booth and win a prize, have fun, be
yourself, be 'absolutely fabulous' but stop and think for a moment about
the 'abject fearful.’ Get involved, make a difference in someone's
life, and, if you are so inclined, say a little prayer for The Rev.
Phelps, right wing Republicans, and all the other hate mongers.
As
the Dalai Lama said, when asked why he prayed for the Chinese invaders
of Tibet, whose atrocities against his people can never be forgotten,
"Oh, we must pray for them. Because they are the ones who need prayer
most of all.”
