After the first 10 minutes talking to the therapist Doctor Joseph Cassius I was ready
to leave his office. I had the feeling he thought I was there to be
'cured' of my homosexuality. Getting up, ready to leave, I explained the
one problem I didn't have in my life was being gay and tat was not the
reason I was there. I do know at one point he suggested I try (we will
get back to that word eventually) heterosexuality for a period of time
and I told him I would if, at the same time, he would try homosexuality
for the same period. He asked me why I was there and we got started.
After I spent 2 sessions with him he thought I was ready for group and
so I was seeing him for individual and group sessions.  After 6 months
he asked me if I would like to become a Transactional Analysis therapist and I told him I had too much on my plate though I was thinking of introducing it to my WW meetings.

I
don't have any pictures of Joe but I always have his image in my head.
He looked like a boxer from the Bronx and was as smart as a whip. Being
short and fiesty he took no bull from anyone and expected the truth
24/7. He did more to help me get my head on my shoulders and I survived
anything that came in the future remembering what he said.

I
did let him down 3 times and it all revolved around sex, naturally! I
went to a TA weekend marathon in San Francisco and stayed an extra week
having a fling with the therapist who was in charge. Another time I went
to New Orleans for a 3 day seminar on using TA, incorporating Eric
Berne's methods and other aspects such as physical therapy, Richian
massage, to help individuals and how to use in groups. I met the
organizer of the seminar and what can I say except I stayed a few extra
days. In 1975 I knew Joe was having a 'brush up' weekend marathon and I
decided to attend. We checked in to his place on Mt. Moriah Road Friday
evening and was not suppose to go outside or contact anyone. The rules
were laid out and anyone breaking them would not be allowed to stay. On
Sunday we passed around a blank piece of paper with just our name and
everyone was suppose to write something positive. Making a long story
short the following was on my paper: "I like your body, your love and
your contact with people--especially in the back room." Do I have to
explain any further? I still have that paper with about 10 positive
comments on it that I take out once in awhile. In any case somehow Joe
found out and he was furious and I pointed out that his rules said
nothing about sex which only infuriated him more so I shut up and took
the tongue lashing!

There
were 2 things that happened at separate sessions with Joe that I have
never forgotten. I don't remember why he was here but my father was in
Memphis and was attending the Weight Watchers salute to me in the
ballroom of a hotel and which he was very impressed with me. I asked him
to stay until Monday and come meet Joe and participate in my session,
which he did. Again, I don't remember what made it happen but in the
middle of the session, for the first time, and the last, my father said
"I love you" to me.

The
second happening was just as intense but in a completely different way.
Bernie and I were having really big personal problems and I suggested
he go to see Joe which he did and then Joe asked us to have a combined
meeting. The session became so heated that for the first, and last, time
I felt I could kill someone with my bare hands and that someone was
Bernie. Joe saw what was happening and he pushed me out of the room. 15
minutes later he called me back into the room, told me to read a piece
of paper and sign it. It turned out to be a very stupid move on his
part, though he meant well, and even more stupid for me to sign it!

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TO
BE CONTINUED: WHAT I SIGNED BUT MORE IMPORTANT WHAT I LEARNED FROM JOE
CASSIUS, TRANSACTIONAL ANALYSIS AND OTHERS THAT HAVE SEEN ME THROUGH THE
GOOD, THE BAD, THE UGLY OF THE PAST 40 YEARS AND MADE ME AS FABULOUS AS
I AM! LOL

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