I consider myself a big "dissapointment" to many in my family. Others as well. Personally, I'd have to agree (for the most part).

I'm going to get "very" deep into some things that are personal to me. You may not understand all. You may not care. Sometimes I think I write, just to "hear" what I think. This may be a long post. I hope you do read it. It will tell alot about this person you know as "coincutter"

I'll be talking what "I feel" are good qualities, what I know are bad qualities. What I know people think (as I have no lack of hearing it). Just kinda some "deep thoughts". So, you go ahead and have your opinions. Just listen to what I say.. all will be true. If I say some "good things", I am not trying to brag. I just want you to understand my life. Don't worry.. I'll say the bad too.

-----------

In my life, I can't remember a time someone said I wasn't a natural "talent". Actually.. this is the biggest problem. Everyone says I am "incredible" with most anything I do. But I always "Fuck up", and don't live up to my potential". Mostly they are right.

The first time I realized I was "good" at stuff. I was just a kid. Video games. Back in those days, they kept track of "world records" on video games. The game "Robetron 2084" was my best. I done won trophies for many other games before. Anyway, I was playing it one day. I played 8 and a half hours on a quarter. People were calling the news and such to get them to come out and record it (they didn't). There might have been 50 people watching me. It was a huge crowd. I done beat the known world record by three times. you have to realize, in the early 80's this was a big deal. I felt tired.. I was hungry. I finally just said "Fuck it" (I had almost un-limited free guys). I told some kid to "take over". I walked out the store.. and rode my bike home. Left them all there. I didn't say a word to any. Personally I know I hold the "un-recorded" world record. I didn't want to deal with the people or anything.

I got my first real "dirt bike" in 5th grade. I was riding daily then. I rode daily from 5th grade to my early twenties. From an early age,, everyone seen I was good. If I was going to ride somewhere, they followed. Not sure if they just liked seeing me landing on my head or what..lol. Eventually, I ended up breaking more bones then I can remember. Ruptured my spleen.. all that. I was "Cocky" I was stupid. Yet I was FAST. I killed my own chances of being one of the worlds top racers. I had the "speed", not enough brains to handle it. To this day, I KNOW I was as fast (or faster) then any top racer today.

I think that's when I started getting into pot and such. Like everything I do.. I get "Obsessive". My injuries from motocross caused me "not" to ride at the level I was used too. I got bigtime into pot. The dealers I had, were some of the biggest in Detroit at the time. I got a couple of drunk drivings, I totaled out 7 cars. I was on the wrong path awhile.

I went to "Trade school" electronics. I was "stoned constant". I smoked 10 or more joints (of good weed) daily then. I was a straight "A" student. Always stoned, everyone cheated off me. I was supposed to be going for a job at "GM". I got into an argument with my Grandpa. They told him some things that weren't true.. but I was fucking that up other ways too. I finally said... "Fuck you all" I didn't really want to work there anyway. All they do is "work to be working" no time with family (never had much with my dad).. I started the "coincutting business".

I was good from the start at the "coincutting" thing. I couldn't handle the pressure then. I can think of dozens of times, I had dozens of people wanting an order. I'd close the boards.. and walk away. Never saying anything either. Today I don't have that problem. But I do "if overwhelmed" stop cutting... and sometimes just sit in the middle of them and have a smoke or beer. It's my nature.. it's erratic on so many levels. You just don't know.

Around that time, I was "dabbling" in computer programming. Eventually, I became "fluent" in 10 languages. I was also starting to read the Bible alot. God was like "calling me out" and I needed a "less" crazy life.

On the Bible end.. I felt I needed to read all religions. It became "study". Heck the way I thought of it. I had "atheists in the family, Catholics, Baptists, and others" They all seemed nutty to me. I needed to seek my "answers" for myself. This began for me, an 8 year study. I read anything and everything. 10 hours a day. I am serious. I am one of the most "obsessive" people you will meet.

I was getting good at computers. I was already "fluent" in about 5 computer languages when I decided to write a "Biblical program". It took 2.5 years, and is registered in the Library of Congress. There are no "personal views" in it. Just actual scripture. It's kinda a "quiz/game" thing. It is called "Disciples_Quest_ and was used all over as a teaching tool. I can promise, I am as fluent as anyone you know about "Biblical" facts. I never shy away from religious questions. I don't always live right. But I know overall I try to help people.

On the "programming end", I was getting good too. I wrote many games. I did alot. "C/C++ is my main language. I gave up the idea of doing that for a living. Hard to compete with "Microsoft" as a lone programmer. So I do it for fun. I can promise however, if you have any computer questions.. ask. I know as much (and usually more) then anyone else out there. I can't answer "specific" questions about someone else's software (because I don't know the internal of all software), but as general knowledge, I'm your guy. I know the way computers work better then most anyone. Plus.. I'm FREE with all my advice.

So I guess the people got to thinking. Gary is gonna be working for a big software company, or maybe he'll be a minister. No, none of that is for me. I couldn't work for a software company because.. I couldn't be myself. Plus I am self taught with no degree. It's funny tho, I get programmers asking me all the time for advice. I couldn't be a minister, because some of my beliefs are "not the norm" of any established religion. I can however state my beliefs VERY factual from a Biblical study.. anyone would have a hard time proving me wrong.

So.. lol. I basically became the "coincutter" I am today. Hey I've had some good times. If I tried to list all the "Rock Stars" I've hung with in the past 24 years, it'd be too long to post. I could never say all the events I've attended. I've been all over really. I make good money, but the "fee's and whatever other expenses are huge". I just survive. I live day to day really. Wherever I go (however), there is always a crowd wanting to see me work. That part is kinda cool.

I got millionares in my family. Artists too. They all pretty much think "I don't live up to my potential". Like I say, they are partially right. I party alot, I am erratic. I am as quick to say "Fuck it" as go for it. To most of them, I am a "dissapointment". Not because they feel I don't do anything. Because they feel I could do more. Maybe I could, but I just can't go 100% all the time. Everyone needs a break.

To me.. you just don't know what it's like "being me". There is so much more then anyone could imagine with my work. I'll leave it there.

If ANYONE wants to talk to me, about any subject really. I will be here. I'm actually a very well read person. If I don't understand, I'll try to inform myself. I read constant.. more then most anyone.

Just a little more about my life :)
Gary