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When I wrote about Woody, I hinted that perhaps Woody 's meanness was inherited from his father. I thought that you might find my recollections of Bill interesting.
Bill was a full-blooded German and proud of it. I can't count the many times that he would brag about his lineage and that of his wife, Ruby, also a full-fledged German. Ruby was one of the sweetest persons that I have ever known. Perhaps all of the suffering that she had to endure at the hands of her husband shaped her, or perhaps she was just a very sweet person, for if she had not been so, she surely would have knocked Bill in the head near the beginning of their marriage.
Bill's mother died when he was very young. There were six children all together, two girls and four boys. The youngest son went to live with a cousin after his mother died. He was able to escape the hardships that the others lived through daily. I remember Bill talking about making blood sausage and taking fruit up to the roof to dry for later use. All of these sibings were warped in some fashion, for their father was a very difficult man. Their father's father had stood up on a local town square eulogizing Hitler during WWII. I'm surpised the man wasn't stoned to death. So as far as the meanness and warped disposition go, I guess they all came by it honestly!
Now to the older Bill, the one that shaped Woody so much during his youth. Bill ruled his household with an iron hand and tight would not describe his relationship with money. Bill and Ruby had two children, Dixie and Woody. Bill felt that women were insignificant, so he naturally favored Woody over his sister. Dixie never had a kotex until she was married. Ruby had to make her feminine pads from old rags. When she left on her senior trip, Ruby slipped her $5 that she had made taking in washing and ironing. Bill didn't even get out of bed to say goodbye. Dixie married as soon as she was out of high school primarily to get away from her father.
If Bill ever became angry with Ruby, she and the kids had to take the bed apart and move it to another room. For Bill refused to sleep with Ruby in their bedroom, but he wanted the bed, so they moved it. He was served meals first and took the best and most of everything. They could have what was left over, but if they took anything, they had to eat it all. Like Woody, Bill wanted only the hot meals immediately upon his arrival home from the factory. I never remember a time when the family had cold cuts, for Ruby, just as I did, cooked whether she was sick or not!
Bill was a bitter, self-serving individual. When Ruby was dying in the hospital, Bill was piled in the bed, complaining about how bad he felt. He didn't even want to go to the hospital to see Ruby. Don't you believe that his not wanting to go had anything to do with seeing Ruby in that condition. He just realized that she was no good to him anymore, so why bother. I marched into the bedroom and told him to get his sorry ass out of the bed, get dressed and go say goodbye to Ruby. He actually heeded my words and went to everyone's dismay. Woody had already been gone for several years before Ruby got sick. Bill wanted me to take Ruby's place and care for him and his home as she did. But I had had enough of their male dominance and refused. Poor Dixie had to take care of the individual who had made her youth a living hell.
I don't know if this explains Woody's behavior during our marriage or not. I have always felt though that Woody was merely imitating his father. That was the only example that he knew. If nothing else, I have learned that a loving home is so essential to children when they are growing into adults, for they will pattern themselves after the examples set by us.
