There are so many arcane rules when it comes to qualifying for government assistance to help with flood recovery. I'm not talking about cash money, this particular program is removal of debris from parts of the river on private land. Usually, FEMA money can only be applied to public land, but our governor and Congressmen got a special exemption.

Even so, there were stipulations: not commercial land, not undeveloped land, must be low enough in the river channel to be a threat to public health and safety in spring runoff. If we hired a contractor to remove it, we would not be able to put the debris where the county would remove it for free: the contractor would have to haul it to the landfill and pay the fees.

The debris pile in question was technically on my land, but more visible from the adjacent public park. I felt that it was in their interest to come get it without making a big fuss about the rules because that park didn't sustain a lot of damage, and FEMA was going to write them a check for recovery without any fuss.

This morning, I heard the beep-beep-beep of heavy equipment, but didn't realize it was coming from that park for about an hour. By the time I got over there, the debris pile was gone. I don't think they realized it was on my land, so they did it without a lot of red tape, which is what I was fervently hoping for.

It costs $250 to move this equipment in, and around $150 an hour machine time, including the operator. And trucks to haul it off cost $85 an hour, plus landfill fees.



Before:





The worst of the debris is gone. What's left is small enough that I can gather it by hand.





This was my last major river-related problem. I still have expensive other problems and challenges, but it's a relief to cross this one off the list.